Tuesday, November 26, 2013

If I was your vampire

I'm sitting here, having a coffee, looking at the fresh snow outside, thinking about the trend in monster movies/tv shows. 

I can't be the only one, who has noticed it. Two years ago, it was vampires and werewolves being all the rage, now it's slid into zombies and witches. I love witches. Not a fan of zombies. Which is ironic when you think about given how zombies and vampires criss-cross and blend.

I'm loving the new show Witches of East End.  And was thrilled when I heard they got a second season.

I used to have this parlor trick back in college, where I could tell a person's personality by their favourite horror movie.  It evolved into me being able to guess a movie connecting it to them.  Most of the time I was bang on, which always scared people. Usually followed by a raised eyebrow and a shake of the head before they swore and mumbled at me.
So, sitting here bored out of my skull and thinking of something movie wise to add to this movie blog I decided to play a game. Pointless as it truly is, come waste some time with me as I play...

If that wrestler was a vampire movie... (I told you I'm bored and it's totally pointless. No wrestler was harmed or intentionally insulted in the making of this post.)

Level one-  Roman Reigns = Blade
                -  Tyler Breeze = Twilight
                -  Austin Aries = Van Helsing
                - Dean Ambrose = Vampire's Kiss
Level two- Corey Graves = Fright Night
                 -Leo Kruger = Vamp
                 -Brad Maddox= Underworld
Level three- Chris Sabin = Monster Squad
                 - Seth Rollins = Crypt Keeper's Bordello of Blood
Level four- Alex Shelley = Subspecies

As you can see, some were harder then others to match up, and no one got Interview with the Vampire or Lost Boys, cause you know, they're Interview with the Vampire and Lost Boys.       

If you haven't choked on your coffee yet or died of laughter, let's continue...

What does Blade say about you... silent strength, a deeper connection to your environment then most realize, killer observation skills, the ability to straddle two worlds without ever falling prey to either. There is a loyalty in you that only a very select few ever have the chance to witness.

What does Twilight say about you... you know someone was going to get a fluff piece. Or are they? On the surface it's shinny, pop-culture, but under the skin, there is something darker and dangerous lurking. Something to be taken serious. The complete idea of a  predator just waiting. Like the ever present bad boy who might be just misunderstood, you are able to draw others towards you without them knowing you're just not what you first appeared. In the end, you become the strongest of those around you.

What does Van Helsing say about you... Skills on top of skills on top of skills. You know you're the top of the food chain, and you have no reason to prove it, but you do with ease.

What does Vampire's Kiss say about you... Think how Nicolas Cage portrays the character in this film. You're brought into the desire and the damages without knowing what end is truly up. You're made to believe one way at first, then hit with another explanation, only to be left thinking your first response was the true one. It's a mind-bender that bleeds honesty. You constantly leave everyone asking what is really happening?

(I've put way too much time into thinking about this, and it's off the cuff...what does that say about me?)

What does Fright Night say about you... classic, clean, but with a honestly serious twist. The guy next door is more then he seems. There is a darkness about you that you've been trying to hide, only you no longer want to hide it, and you let yourself get caught. You slip up on purpose, for the simple reason you've seen it all done it all and are ready to show the world who you really are.

What does Vamp say about you... you are hiding in plan sight, constantly hinting at the power you actually have without giving any of the reality of it away. Still allowing the fantasy to be believed, until it's too late for those around you.

What does Underworld say about you... well you're just power hungry. Okay, maybe not completely. But you are torn between what you have been made to trust to this point, and what you find out for yourself later on.

What does Monster Squad say about you...there is an innocence about you, even though you've been through hell and high water, you still manage to keep that spark of life going.

What does Crypt Keeper's Bordello of Blood say about you... you're the kind who would make a cup of coffee jealous, you're that fast paced. Methodical and patient in your schemes, you know when to let loose and when to hold back. You always get what you want in the end, even if it means using yourself as bait. You are able to live within the rules but still break them, and no one is the wiser.

What does Subspecies say about you... steep in tradition, you have one main goal. You use every tool at your disposal and take no refusal in order to get it, even if that means playing a bit dirty.  There is a hurt lost innocence under the harshness, one that can't seem to keep you out of mischief. You always find a way to land on your feet, even when loosing your head.


Some were much easier to pin point then others.  Now, go out and rent those vampire movies and see what you think.

till later

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