Saturday, April 30, 2016

year 5 day 132

movie: Resident Evil
starring: Milla Jovovich, Eric Mabius
genre; Sci-fi, Horror,
year: 2002
format: TV Edit

plot: A woman wakes up without her memory, and is taken to an underground lab, where a virus has managed to turn everyone into zombies.

Based on the video games.

Holy Omega Man Syndrome Batman! I really see how 90% of the zombie genre has developed from the vampire genre. Yeah, I'm never letting that factor go.

So you've got a big bad corporation that is slicing up dna between humans and animals and playing around with dead things. You just know that's got trouble written all over it.  I'm guessing the big theme behind it and the original game is got something to do with not trusting big corps?
TV edit, so the gore was minimal which was fine for me. (I must be too old can't stomach stuff like I used to) There was a lot of shoot 'em up-ing and not much in the way of an actual plot. Which, may or may not be the fault of the tv edit.
You do have some basic spy on spy sabotage going on with the lead character and her husband. You know from the beginning that one of them is the big bad who unleashed everything, but it doesn't play as smooth as it could have. (again might have been the tv edit)

I'd like to know what the monster at the end of the hallway was suppose to be? We see it escape, feed and then become something worse. Was it a dog? Was it a human once? Was it a giant tasmanian devil? It just sort of is there and then dies in a blaze of unnatural greeny flames.

what did I learn? Everyone wants to play Doctor Frankenstein.

Friday, April 29, 2016

year 5 day 131

movie: Sex, Death and Bowling
starring: Adrian Grenier, Joshua Rush
genre: Drama,
year: 2015
format: Netflix Canada

plot: When a man finds out his brother is dying of cancer, he returns home to spend the last few days with his family, and ends up taking his brother's place on the bowling team.

I get that this movie is a serious topic being tackled in a not so serious way, but there wasn't much to it.  Guy comes home spends time with his family, and there are a bunch of flashbacks to when he was in high school. Part of it is how his nephew deals with a group of bullies at school, part of it is how his dad treats the fact he's gay and a fashion designer. The father and sister-in-law are sort of not dealing with the whole thing, each avoiding the real situation in their own way. The bowling tournament being the big distraction, as the nephew makes this last promise to his dad to win.

This could have had the ability to be a big heartbreaking tear jerker of a story, but it's just bare bones and lacks any real guts.

what did I learn? I still hate bowling.

Thursday, April 28, 2016

The Nosferatu Adventures s10 p9

The Nosferatu Adventures
page 257, chapter 257

2024
Rolf's Kingdom...

Little William sniffed, gave a wide eyed silent cough then proceeded to rub the back of his sleeve over his nose sniffing again. "What's the matter kiddo, got a cold?" Malone said. The short male scratched mindlessly at the tattoo on his left shoulder, nodding towards the little boy.

"He's half werewolf. Can't be getting a cold." Finn replied as he continued to lean over the large volume in front of him, not looking at the other male. Malone had been given the task of delivering a letter to Rolf from his own pack alpha Jarl. Upon seeing the castle, the shapeshifter decided it would be interesting to stick around for a few days.

"If you say so, but the kid's snotting all over the place." he remarked reaching for the coffee pot on the middle of the table and pouring himself another cup.  Finn glanced over the edge of his round tinted sunglasses in the direction of the youngest wolf. He had to admit, the kid had been looking less than impressive the last few days. Watching little William sneeze a few more times in quick concession, the familiar moved towards him, placing the back of his hand against the kid's forehead.

"Okay, he is a bit warm. Well, warmer than normal for a lycanthrope. Do banshees get ill?" he asked out loud. He turned, twisting himself up in an awkward pose to stare once again at Malone when he didn't answer him. The dark haired wolf shrugged. "Right..."

"Take him to a doctor or something. You've got one in the castle I'm sure."

"No, actually we don't. Haven't for a few years now." the familiar let out a deep sigh crossing his arms over his chest, tilting his head to the side. "So what am I suppose to do with you? Take you to a vet?"

"Isn't Harker and Dagan's uncle a doctor?" Malone asked having grabbed one of the books off the top of the stack Finn had been reading. Making a face, he flipped through it listening to the crispness of the pages.

"Yeah...Doctor Frankenstein. But, the whole reason he's here..." he pointed to William. "And not at the Frankenstein's right now, is because Damen didn't want to play nice."

"Most never do when they're from a different pack." Malone answered.

Jumping back Finn landed perfectly on the edge of the table in one swift move, as little William vomited right where Finn's shoes had been. "That's not healthy."


Meanwhile...

Out of Time

Edric shook his head, the heel of his left palm pressed against his eye.  Quentin was hot on his heels, trailing him just a few feet away. He had sensed Quentin fall back a few steps after growling at him. The dude was practically on his bumper as they zig zagged through the streets, Edric unfamiliar with the neighbourhood they found themselves. He honestly had no idea where he was headed, he was just headed. His brain seemed to swim with a strange buzzing noise that dragged him forward. Purely gut instinct it seemed, leading him farther and farther away from the old warehouse Quentin had taken him to. He supposed he should thank the guy, from what Quentin had said, another hour in the morgue and Edric wouldn't have woken up. He had been next on the list for autopsy. That meant his heart would have been removed from his body along with his other organs. Even Edric had seen enough horror movies to know that no matter what kind of monster, you still needed your heart.
He continued to stumble down the street, the buzzing thankfully getting quieter as he did. That's when he started to pick up a scent. It was the strangest thing he'd ever come across. Like a mixture of lilacs, honey and wet dog.  It was if the scent itself was alive, burning his nose, creeping down his spine twirling itself into the very core of his being.  Pressing on, he turned the corner to find himself in front of a large building.

"I don't think we can get in there." Quentin's voice seemed muffled like he was talking under water. Edric slapped both palms on the glass of the rotating door, which was locked for the night. A sound escaped Edric's throat without him even realizing it as he slammed his fist into the door again, this time the glass shattered. Both males ducked as it began to rain shards of glass.  Stepping over the carnage, Edric continued on into the building, with Quentin sheepishly standing on the sidewalk still. The human stuffed his hands deep into the pockets of his dirty grey hoodie, as he removed the hood finger combing his hair before placing it back on his skull. Taking a quick glance around, he then followed the lycanthrope into the large building.

Edric was standing between the elevators and the doorway to the stairs, unsure which way to go. His nose was high in the air as he sniffed deeply, finally deciding to try the elevator. He leaned over pressing his face to the button pad, the crazy scent strongest on the two top buttons. Growling, the new werewolf closed his eyes. Without thinking, he hit the button for the penthouse.

The scent of wet dog became suddenly heavy, as our heroine's nose twitched. All her senses telling her to go into the hallway, to the elevator and investigate. Her brain on the other hand was screaming at her to run into the bathroom and lock the door. "What am I the blonde scream queen in some bad 70's movie?" she asked herself out loud. She was alone in the apartment, Loki having taken the still unnamed hellhound puppy for a walk. Shaking her right arm, her hand became clawed talons. "But just in case..." she mumbled, her voice becoming less secure. Slowly she moved closer to the front door, placing one bare foot over the other as she did. The ability to keep her guard up was slipping from her quickly, as her mind began to whirl in a kaleidoscope of emotions. Raw anger and confusion seemed to be the dominate ones, so strong they almost had a physical image all their own. Our heroine's eyes shifted to the pure white of the banshee as she snarled under her breath, causing what she was seeing to be faint, like a ghostly film image pretending to be real.

There was a knock at the door.  That startled her more than the presence itself. Sniffing, she pressed her nose to the door. There was something else hidden under the wet dog smell that only now was clear. Sweat. Cotton. Denim. Human. They knocked again. A thought jumped into her still swimming mind, maybe there was something going on in the building? Maybe one of the human tenants who lived on the second or fourth floors were in trouble? Flexing her hand so that it was once again human looking, our heroine closed her eyes clearing her throat. "Try to get a grip woman." she mumbled opening the door.

And that was her first mistake.  A howl of pain escaped her lips as she ripped her arm from him. Blood dripped silently to the floor in three perfect drops as the wound was already closed. Covering her arm with her other hand our heroine swore before lunging towards the male.

"That's enough!" she felt a hand at the back of her neck tossing her across the room. She landed on her butt a few centimeters away from the foot of the sofa. Loki had shimmered in behind her, and was holding the newcomer in the corner of the room with one hand. 

"He bit me!" she was on her feet once again pointing her already healed arm towards Edric. "That maniac bit me!"  Edric laughed as he wiped the corner of his mouth with his thumb. The buzzing finally quiet in his mind, the fierce grip that had been squeezing his spine loosened as the last drop of her blood left a slight tingle in his mouth.

"He couldn't help it. He was drawn here after he woke up." Quentin's voice cracked as he shuffled through the door.

"Perfect! Just perfect!" Loki screamed in disgust. "You stupid careless bitch! You sired someone!"


Tune in again for another installment of the Nosferatu Adventures starring your heroine...me(straight up story. What goes around comes around)




Wednesday, April 27, 2016

Coffee Talk 27th April 2016

Spudguns!  How's it doing?  I know, I haven't been in much lately, and am really behind on the movie a day challenge. I was just having a conversation about that with a friend of mine, sort of pouting that I have so many blank spots in the movie calendar. They kicked my arse and told me to suck it up, crap happens.  Which is true.  Just means the deadline will go farther into the new year than I had planned.

Good news is, it's nearly summer time here, which means the cinema will be having matinees all week long for the summer. Yay. That means more chances to get out and see some new movies.
I've also got a handful of "what that movie inspired me to do" posts in the works. Plus of course the Night Bleeds All Vampire Book/Movie Club posts...yeah that's a mouthful alright.

And yes, I am working on the next segment of Nosferatu Adventures. The good/bad thing about writing a serial/soap opera about immortal creatures is they never die. They take a hell of a bloody beating, but still keep on keeping on. 

Okay, I just wanted to come in here right quick and drop this little bat dropping at your feet, because I hadn't posting in a few long days. Let you in on a secret, I suck at multitasking. I can only deal with one thing at a time, and this week my tasking has left me drained.

now I need an extra large coffee.

Sunday, April 24, 2016

Year 5 day 130 (April Night Bleeds)

Movie: John Carpenter's Vampires
starring: James Woods, Tim Guinee
genre: Western, Action,
year: 1998
format: DVD

plot: A team of  professional vampire hunters find themselves up against not just a master vampire, but the first vampire. Now, they have to keep him from becoming the most powerful thing on the planet.

Based on the book Vampire$ by John Steakley

This is one of the best adaptions of a book I've ever seen, in any genre. Not the most faithful, let me get that straight, but one of the best. It took the core of the characters and built a great world around them. Like a lot of movie versions of books, this one omits some characters, adds a few new ones and combines others.
The movie kicks off with a great action scene where the slayers are knee deep in a hunt. This particular scene is a few chapters into the book, but it sets the tone for the entire film.

The character of Katrina (Davette in the book), played by Sheryl Lee, in the movie version is a prostitute when she's bitten, (the book she's forced into prostituting herself after she's bitten) and becomes the bait/beacon throughout. This is used to trap the vampire Valek (Ross in the book). She then in a moment of bloodlust, bites Montoya (a combination of the characters Carl and Felix from the book) They begin a relationship, which the character of Montoya sites as being in love, but is actually a sire bond. But given Katrina does not have the same level of bond with Valek, we would have to assume there is a mutual attraction between Katrina and Montoya to begin with before she bit him.

We learn one of the high ranking members of the Vatican is a traitor, promising to help Valek with the ritual, in order to become immortal himself. This is how Valek finds out about Crow in the opening scenes where he slaughters the other members of the team.  And that is pretty much the base line for the theme in this version of the story. Who can you trust? You are left asking where does everyone's loyalties lie as you watch them arrive at the abandoned town just before sunset. Montoya has just begun to show his sire bond to the girl, and the riff between himself and Crow has started.

The use of a western for the vampire genre is by far my favourite. I love that this story is unapologetic. Both the movie and the book, the movie more so.  There is a small inside joke near the beginning of the film, where the character of Valek's climbing out of the ground and it fades into the next shot which is a sign for the hotel "Sungod Motel", as Valek is one ritual away from being able to walk in the daylight without dying.

There is an official sequel Vampires Los Muertos, which was produced by John Carpenter.  The movie Vampires The Turning, is not an "official" sequel, but it does have elements that can be considered connecting it to the other two.

what did I learn? Crossbows never go out of style


Vampire$ -Jack Crow is the leader of a group of professional vampire hunters, who are being backed by the Vatican. For the last few years, the team members have survived some pretty dangerous rounds of vampire hunting, loosing the odd few on each mission. This time, they find themselves facing a vampire who happens to know about them. This vampire, Ross, is stronger than any they've come across and manages to wipe out the entire team except for Jack and his two closest members, Cat and Carl. When the remaining members of the team regroup with their boss, and two new members, Father Adam and Felix; they find a young reporter, Davette on their doorstep. Taking her in, they discover she's been originally sent to distract them long enough for Ross to finish the job, only Davette has by this point become like family to them.

I first read this book when it came out, over 25 years ago when I was in high school. It's been on my list of top five vampire novels ever since, and one that I constantly tell people they should pick up if they want to read anything in the vampire genre.  There are hints of the "classics" running through it's veins, as the main vampire Ross has this impressive control over the character of Davette, her aunt and her best friend Kitty. (think how Dracula has control over Renfield, as well as the three brides, on top of the way he uses Lucy to get to Mina) The relationship between Davette and Kitty can then be compared to not only Lucy and Mina's in Dracula, but also between Laura and Carmilla (Carmilla by Sheridan Le Fanu) or even between Lord Ruthven and Aubrey (The Vampyre by John Polidori)

Half the story is suppose to be happening as you read it, and half is told through flashbacks. We meet the character of Felix first through one of Crow's flashbacks, and learn that Crow's never seen anyone shoot a gun the way Felix can. He in turn becomes their gunman, and is given a few hundred rounds of silver bullets designed just for him, as he likes to use only one specific gun. There is actually a scene in the book, where the vampire Ross crushes this gun, which sort of alters the way Felix then interacts with the rest of the team. Felix and Davette when  they first meet, are both trying to deny they are attracted to each other, each unsure if they are going to stay with the team for their own reasons. As the story progresses, we learn they both grew up in the same wealthy neighbourhood a few years apart.

In the book, garlic doesn't work, stakes are used, but one of the elements I really love is that they bring in the silver bullets. This was one of the few stories I remember reading when I was younger that actually drew from the folklore that silver affects vampires. The main default kill is sunlight though. The book has the hunters dressed from head to toe in chain mail suits, with large electric crosses on the fronts. They are represented as modern day Knights Templar. The movie version drops this, but has the vampires referring to them as "crusaders".

What I got out of the book on this re-read, are themes of shame, humiliation, insecurity, greed and fear. The character of Jack Crow puts on this tough exterior for his crew, but he's constantly monologuing  in his own mind about how scared he is, and belittling himself. The character of Felix does this as well, only not as vibrantly. Neither of them want the position of group leader, but both feel obligated to take on the role.  The whole subplot between Ross/Davette/Kitty, stems from them having grown up together, and the girls treating Ross badly. So what starts off as some typical teenaged behavouir, becomes the catalyst to his torturing them after he becomes a vampire.  I find it interesting, that we never learn about Ross's past other than Davette mentioning that they thought he was a jerk when they were younger. We never learn how or why he becomes a vampire, or why he's been put in a sort of position of power by the vampire who sired him?
It's kind of interesting that Ross never really has his own identity. He dresses the way he believes a vampire should dress, in something that looks like it would have been worn in the 1600's, even though he himself is only suppose to be in his late teens having been turned some time around 1986. This lack of identity is mirrored in Davette's situation, being under his control, and with the whole team as they are merely doing what the Vatican is telling them. There is also this extreme loneliness mirrored between Ross and Crow. Both unable to completely be with the woman they are in love with. Ross is in love with Davette for all the grief she put him through, and Crow is in love with his team member Annabelle, but refuses to allow himself to be with her while they are still hunters. 

And for once I got my homework done early enough to craft/bake/cook something. I wanted to incorporate the words "rock n roll" somehow in the recipe, because in the novel Crow constantly says rock n roll, and the team learn that vampires hate rock music. But, I ended up not being that clever. Instead, I went pretty basic, doing a tofu "steak".  I did however, grab onto the idea of cherries, because the novel has all the characters calling Cat "Cherry Cat", which is never actually explained as to why.  So, I made dry rub for the tofu, and a salad with cherry tomatoes and homemade garlic croutons.



The croutons were simple, I pinched up a few slices of white bread, and mixed them with some minced garlic, salt, parsley and olive oil. Then just popped them into the oven for 20 minutes at 275degrees.



The dry rub for the tofu "steak" contained salt, crushed red pepper flakes, marjoram, and minced garlic.

After removing the majority of the liquid from the tofu with a paper towel, I rolled it in the dry rub, then cooked it on medium-low heat for almost 45 minutes, rotating it in the pan.

When it was done, I deglazed the pan with a bit of pop. I used Dr. Pepper, because that was the only flavour of pop I could find here that even came close to having a "cherry" taste.  I used this as a sauce for the "steak".

The salad was just lettuce, onion, cherry tomatoes, carrots, cheese and green peppers tossed with the homemade croutons.


I would have loved to have done a BBQ or sundried something like jerky to tie into the whole sunlight burns them element, but being vegetarian I wasn't too sure how to go about it.

 I'll be doing a round up for this month's selections later in the week.  So if you've read the book or watched the movie this month and have blogged about it, drop me a comment.  I do know that Heather over on All Roads Lead to the Kitchen joined in this month, so don't forget to check her offering out.

Next month we'll be talking about the 1992 movie Buffy the Vampire Slayer and the 2010 book Jane Slayre. But I'll be back later in the week with the official announcement post for that.

Friday, April 22, 2016

year 5 day 129

movie: Jenny's Wedding
starring: Katherine Heigl, Grace Gummer
genre: Drama,
year; 2015
format; Netflix Canada

plot: After a woman tells her family she is going to marry her girlfriend, they find themselves reevaluating their own happiness.

The heart is there, but this really lacks a lot. The first half is about the "lead" character telling her family she's gay, but it quickly becomes about the parents and sister and how they feel they are viewed by their social circle.

The character of the sister played by Gummer, is probably the most interesting and three dimensional of all the characters. She starts off believing that she is the one with the perfect life everyone is looking for, a husband house kids etc. But, after accepting that her sister is the one who is truly happy, she becomes obsessed with how her front lawn looks. This begins her realization that her picture perfect life is filled with cracks, and she begins to understand she'd be better off divorcing her husband.

what did I learn? The grass isn't always greener on the other side, in fact it just might be dead already.

Wednesday, April 20, 2016

year 5 day 128 (April Food n Flix)

This month's Food n'Flix selection is Tampopo, and is being hosted by Heather of All Roads Lead to the Kitchen

One Movie A Day Challenge part -

movie: Tampopo
starring: Nobuko Miyamoto, Koji Yakusho
genre:undefinable, Drama,
year: 1985
format: online


plot: A widow who is struggling with her ramen shop, gets a helping hand from some strangers.

The main story makes sense. And if you've seen the 2008 movie Ramen Girl, which you can basically call a remake, then you're golden.

Now, I said "main story" because, there are a bunch of little commercial breaks that go nowhere and are frealing pointless. Story #2, which is about a couple having an affair and playing sexual food games, is the only thread that actually connects as the one character gets shot on the doorstep of the noodle shop.  Story #3 - is just a dude who goes to the dentist then becomes a predator offering a little kid ice cream while eyeing them in a disturbing way. Story #4- is the zombie wife who wakes from the brink of death to make one last meal for her family. Story #5- is about a con artist who gets arrested in a restaurant. Story #6- is a bunch of business men who are made fools of by their lowly assistant when he is seen ordering a big French meal when none of the rest could read the menu. Story #7- is a grocery store check out guy trying to catch an old woman who keeps squeezing the softer foods.

I was sort of grossed out by the egg yolk scene from story #2, (which ironically lead to some really interesting inside jokes) which is being used as a metaphor for oral sex, along with the scene after it involving just the man eating a raw oyster from the palm of a different woman, teenaged at that. Not saying there wasn't some skill involved in keeping the yolk from breaking but...I really didn't need to see it passed back and forth between the couple's mouths for over a minute. And what the hell did the giant prawn under glass really have to do with anything? Who in their right mind is turned on by a giant sea bug crawling on them?
And story #7 is obviously a masturbation metaphor. Funnier than some of the others.

what did I learn? I officially hate Japanese movies

The Food n'Flix part of the challenge

notes- pork, grapes, potato chips, pears, curry (mentioned) ramen, seaweed, onions, noodles, beer, tofu, rice, eggs, pickles, seafood, salad, escargot, mushroom,walnuts, apples, sausage, spaghetti, cheese, bread and butter, salt, citrus, shrimp, wonton dumplings, bean sprouts, coffee, chicken, sardines, cabbage, wine, rice omelette, pomegranate, tomato, papaya, oysters, ice cream, carrots, turtle, BBQ, lettuce wraps, peaches, jams, ginger, cake, leeks, pastry, octopus, bone marrow, yams, wild boar.

Right off, I swore to Heather that I would not make ramen for this challenge. That was before I even watched the film, and yes she kept me at my word. I really don't understand why this movie gets praised as such a respectable film? I understand that in the early 80's, real foodie movies were not as popular as they are now, but still. This movie is just weird.

And with that said, I decided to make cookies. My inspiration came from two scenes, the scene where they are making turtle soup, and the guy comments that you should never get your fingers near the mouth because they will snap them off, had me thinking of snapping turtles for hours.  And there are a few scenes where someone is chopping up ginger. So ...gingersnaps.

I took my recipe from Joy of Cooking page 767

1 and 3/4 c flour
3/4 teaspoon baking powder
1/4 teaspoon baking Soda
salt dash of
2 and 1/2 teaspoons ground ginger
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/8 teaspoon ground cloves
3/4 stick unsalted butter softened
1 egg
1/4 c molasses
splash of lemon juice

Mix all until blended one colour.
form dough into small balls and place on cookie sheet,
Bake for 12-14 minutes at 325degrees depending on your oven. (recipe called for 350degrees for 12minutes but I found that burned everything too quick)

And guess what....May, I get to host once again!  My selection for next month's Food n'Flix is Witches of Eastwick.  I can't wait to see what kind of witch-tastic ideas everyone comes up with.

Sunday, April 17, 2016

year 5 day 127

movie: Soylent Green
starring: Charlton Heston, Brock Peters
genre: Drama, Sci-fi
year: 1973
format: Hollywood Suites Channel

plot: After investigating a murder, one cop becomes obsessed with the cover up, which leads him to learn that our food supply is not what it seems.

Based on the book Make Room! Make Room!

You would think, that after my last encounter with a Heston film, I would have learned my lesson and passed on this one. But no; I needed to see what all the fuss was about. 

Okay, so here's the thing the actual scene with the introduction of "soylent green" talks about how it's made from plant based product found in/around water. Which, later on we learn there isn't many oceans/lakes left. So that begs to ask how does the world's population not catch on that there is something not right to begin with- with it? 

There is one scene where the "house-wife" is picking up groceries, which contains two apples, a few jars of something unidentifiable, and one very sad stalk of celery. Which costs her $300. And then a mysterious side of roast appears.  This scene is sort of funny and creepy all at the same time. I thought for sure the roast was going to be something more in line with the plot, but if so, it was never admitted to.

I actually found the subplot to be disturbing. The movie itself has no substance to it, but the suggestion that the world is truly becoming like this is what is eerie. The world as we know it, (the movie was set in 2022 a short few years from now) is rapidly moving into a danger zone much like what is seen in the film; over crowded population, polluted environment, lack of natural resources etc. The movie brings up the topic of global warming and the fact water had to be filtered/rationed. There is one scene where the lead character is at the crime scene playing with the bathroom taps just in awe at the fact there is running water. 

what did I learn? It's scary how close we are to a society first written about over 50 years ago.

Saturday, April 16, 2016

year 5 day 126

movie: Hit and Run
starring: Tom Arnold, Bradley Cooper
genre: Action, Comedy
year: 2012
format: Netflix Canada

plot: A guy who is in witness protection decides to break free in order to drive his girlfriend to L.A. for a job interview, and along the way gains the attention of the people he's hiding from.

So like pretty much everything that comes out now, it's 90% done in a car. So many many pointless car chases.  The only good thing about this, is it reminded  a lot of the old Cannonball Run and Smokey and the Bandit movies.

You have a strange mix of characters, the young couple, her ex boyfriend, the criminals, and the cops who are chasing them. One of the cops, is the brother of the ex boyfriend and begins "dating" the other cop who is suppose to be the only one who knows about the witness protection. And everyone gets tangled in everyone's business.
I wanted to like this movie, I really did, but it just didn't have enough plot for me. It relied too much on the flashy cars, and cheap road gags and didn't give itself time to actually go anywhere. The best scene was the one in the grocery where Bradley Cooper's character is arguing with some guy over dog food and the treatment of his dog; before force feeding the dude the kibble.

what did I learn? White guys should never wear dreadlocks

Friday, April 15, 2016

year 5 day 125

movie: The Hateful Eight
starring: Samuel L. Jackson, Tim Roth
genre: Western, Crime, Drama,
year; 2015
format: Shaw Video On Demand

plot: A bounty hunter in the 1800's, finds himself stranded for a few days in the middle of  a blizzard along with his prisoner and a group not to be trusted.

So a few things were going through my mind while watching this  1) it is just so beautifully shot. There were scenes that made me think -and rightly so- of westerns from the 1960's, as well as Hammer films and even the way Bram Stoker's Dracula (1992) had been shot.  From the first few seconds of the opening credits, you almost expect John Wayne's name to come up or something, you know you're about to watch a western.  and 2) this movie is so bloody long!  I saw the "watered down general version" at almost 3 hours, and midway, all I could think was "there's an extended version?"  (yeah I know, I guess I'm just getting old and everything takes to long these days)

This has the feel of a stage play, given there really are only two sets, the stage coach where the first half of the movie takes place -which is basically the intro- and the cabin area (this includes the one shot of the barn and out house)  And that first hour is where the heaviness of dialogue takes place. At the midway mark, we get Tarantino's voice over filling in a few gaps, setting us up for the shift in genres; which is where the real "Tarantino" film starts. You almost want a rain slicker there is so much blood from that point on.

The big theme here is race issues. There's no denying it, there's no running from it, there's only the question of why do they all sound like they've been hanging out on the Jeffersons? I kept expecting someone to scream for "Whizzie".

what did I learn? Even when Tim Roth is not the star of the show, he's the star of the show.

Thursday, April 14, 2016

year 5 day 124

movie: Pay the Ghost
starring: Nicolas Cage, Stephen McHattie
genre: Thriller,
year:2015
format: Netflix Canada

plot: When a couple's son disappears on Hallowe'en night, they spend a whole year trying to find him, and uncover a three hundred year old ghost.

Based on the short story

I have to admit, there were a few jumps for me. Which has become a rare thing. You know the jump scares are coming, but they managed to still work.  This is a nice throwback to the kind of ghost story you would have seen from Twilight Zone or Ray Bradbury.  What I liked most about this is that it brings in some of the actual folklore, with the idea of why you wear costumes on Hallowe'en which is to hide from the spirits so that they don't take you away. I also liked the mixing of the Weeping Woman into the plot.

Cage is believable enough as a man obsessed with the spooky side of the kidnappings, but not so much as the grieving father. You almost would believe him more, if he'd been hired as a ghost hunter instead. There were moments when all I could think was that it reminded a little bit of Crow 2 City of Angels, where they only have 3 nights of Hallowe'en/Day of the Dead to come back for revenge of his son being killed.
The end was however, a little less than expected. It wraps up too quickly and little too easily. I think they could have given an extra ten minutes to the ending, instead of wrapping it up they way they did. You don't feel the time crunch like you should, as he's only got till midnight to go through a portal and back. Which begs to differ, why does the old blind prophet take his watch from him? If you're under a time issue wouldn't your watch be one of the things you would need most?  He tells him to hurry he's only got till midnight after that he's stuck there forever, yet he steals his watch.

what did i learn? This type of story is Cage's element.

Monday, April 11, 2016

year 5 day 123

movie: Albert Nobbs
starring: Glenn Close, Aaron Taylor-Johnson
genre: Drama
year: 2011
format; Netflix Canada

plot: A woman living as a man in the early 1900's, tries to juggle a normal life.

Based on the novel.

Normally, I like anything set in this time period, but I found this to drag on a bit too long. I think ten or even fifteen minutes could have been chopped from it, and it still wouldn't have lost any of it's plot.
I really wanted to like the characters, but I found them less and less interesting as the film progressed. The character of the love interest played by Mia Wasikowska, was just too whinny.  And all the male characters seemed to be treated in one dimensional views. (abusive drunks, careless playboys with a different woman each night, cowardly)

The themes lean heavily on identity, freedom, independence, and feminism. You're under the impression for the first half of the movie, that the lead character is living as a man just for the chance to earn a job in a time when women couldn't hold certain positions in society, but midway through, the direction changes and we learn she's a lesbian. Only, she comes across as not completely seeming to understand it herself, when she talks about her life as a man. I'm not completely sure if that was the way the character was written or just the delivery of the lines?

what did I learn? I'm not sure I learned much on this one.

The Nosferatu Adventures s10 p8

The Nosferatu Adventures
page 256, chapter 256

Out of Time

The god rolled on his shoulder backwards, his feet landing firmly on the ground, digging in. Hunched over on one knee, his fingers spread out in front of him, the other elbow tight to his side, he charged. Slamming his shoulder into his opponent he heard the crash more than felt it.

Waking with a start, Loki groaned. The sun was too bright and his eyes hurt. He silently cursed the whole white on glass idea as he rolled over onto his back, the bedsheets falling less than gracefully from his naked body. It was rare for him to actually dream and when he did, it was always an omen. He opened the bedroom door just a centimeter, the scent of coffee filling the air.  He swore silently as he nearly tripped over the still sleeping hellhound, who's tiny body was curled up pressed against his bedroom door. After the realization the day before, that the pup was missing, Loki had to go out looking for him. He was none too happy to learn that Bacchus not only had the creature, but had brought Dagan to this reality. A tidbit he was not yet willing to share with our heroine.  Yawning, the dark haired god began to make his way to the shower, noticing our heroine's door was not closed all the way. Smirking to himself, Loki licked his lips as he let his eyes flash from their human brown to the amber-grey of the wolf then to a pure gold. Placing a strong hand on the doorknob, he leaned into the bedroom just enough to catch her eye.

"The puppy needs to be walked. And given a name still." he remarked, his voice never once showing any hint of emotion. Our heroine grunted as she continued to shuffle through the pile of clothes she'd bought. Loki's eyebrows knitted together. "What are you up to?" he asked opening the door farther stepping into the room. Scratching at his shoulder, the dark haired god leaned around our heroine, first pointing to the nearest dress before picking up the edge of it, letting it fall back onto the bed. He brushed against her hip, completely forgetting for a second he was naked. "Since when do you need these? You're a shapeshifter, you think it and then magick mist it."

"Since I started sleeping with a human." She turned to face him. "That your true eyes?" she asked staring at him. Loki's face seemed to relax before furrowing his eyebrows again. Squaring his jaw he made a noise indicating that it wasn't. The banshee was beside the closet hanging the outfits before the god could think. Clearly, the conversation was over as far as our heroine was concerned. Letting out a short huff, that he was certain she didn't hear, Loki continued on to the shower.

He let the water ripple over him as he thought about what just happened. She didn't make any comments to the fact he was naked. Which wasn't like her. The steam rose as his own anger did. How dare she! Loki thought to himself. Normally, a situation like that would have had our heroine not only blushing wildly, but have her stumbling and stammering as she tried to avoid obviously staring. He'd caught her practically drooling over him in the past. And now, nothing?  He was a god, people feared him, they desired him, they respected and loved him. What they didn't do was ignore him when he was standing beside them naked! The steam became a dense fog as his emotions continued to rise. He was going to rip Arthur's beating heart out and eat it.

Storming back into her bedroom a moment later, water droplets still clinging to his warm skin, he growled. Wrapping his one hand around the upper part of her arm, he pulled her tight against him, his other hand at her throat. Sniffing from the edge of her collarbone up to her ear, craning her chin he found nothing.  Our heroine's heartbeat should have been rapid, her blood should have been rushing in her veins from fear. But instead, she was calm. Too calm. Dropping his hand from her neck, he spun her around to look at her, his other hand still gripping her arm. He was about to say something, when he stopped. Watching as she tilted her head to the side, her eyebrows knitting together. Letting go of her completely, he followed her gaze. There on his shoulder was a tear in his flesh, a large bone plate starting to stick out.  Our heroine reached over with her delicate fingers running the tips over it. In his anger, Loki didn't even feel himself beginning to shapeshift.  It was gone, his body once again smooth in it's human form leaving our heroine's hand hovering a few centimeters over his shoulder. The jealousy he'd just been battling with subsided.  Reaching up he grabbed her wrist in his hand, bringing it to his mouth.
Biting down, he felt the pop as his fangs broke the skin. The memory that flooded his mind as the warmth curled around his tongue, was of the night back in 1462 in Vlad's bedroom. The night he'd threatened and informed her that her task was only starting. That Damen was only the first werewolf she'd give birth to for him. She'd hated him then. The very core of her, he'd tasted it in her blood that night, the raw bitterness it had created. But now, as the memory flowed from our heroine to the god, it was just that. A memory. Silent in itself, tasteless to him. She'd forgiven him. Something Loki hadn't been expecting. 
His eyes once again their human brown, he let out a deep sigh looking around the room. It was a disaster. She lived like a teenager with her books and coffee cups piled on every surface.  He hadn't yet let go of her wrist, his thumb mindlessly working in tiny circles on the inside of it, his bite already healed. His other hand suddenly at the back of her neck, he pressed his forehead to hers closing his eyes, just breathing the moment in. He was tired of playing hard to get, of denying what she had come to mean to him.

It only took him ten minutes to express what he'd been holding back for over a decade.


Tune in again for another installment of the Nosferatu Adventures starring your heroine...me(straight up story. Every god has their weakness.)


Sunday, April 10, 2016

Year 5 Day 122 (What that movie Inspired me to do 40)

movie: Labyrinth
starring: David Bowie, Jennifer Connelly
genre: Fantasy
year:1986
format: DVD

plot:When a teenaged girl makes a wish out of anger, she discovers her baby brother has been kidnapped by the King of the Goblins just like in her favourite fairy tale, and only has one night to get him back.

Everyone I know loves this movie. Everyone I have ever talked to loves the songs in this movie.

There are so many elements in this that remind me of Alice in Wonderland, from the double headed card guards, to the needing to stay on the good side of the king, to the fact you're never completely sure who can be trusted. (think the Cheshire Cat)  As well as Little Red Ridding Hood. The idea that innocence is fleeting and not every promise is one of good intentions.

Honestly, I've never totally seen this as a kid's movie. There is that hint of forbidden relationship between Sarah and the King Jareth. Specially the notes of jealousy when Jareth sees her interacting with Hoggle, and tosses them both into the bog of eternal stench. And has anyone else noticed there are more than a few shots of him only from the waist down...just saying. And can we talk about the dream sequence for a second. It has such a Dionysus vibe to it. The whole masked ball never felt "safe or innocent" to me. It always had a sexually charged vibe and a down right creepy vibe too. As if you expect someone to either get raped in the middle of things or an axe to the neck. There is just something sinister about it. (her hair in that ballroom scene always put me in mind of Bride of Frankenstein, with the up do and silver/white barrettes)

Like any sword and sorcery movie, you've got the brave knight going on a quest to save the princess...er okay in this case the prince, as our "knight" is the Connelly character of Sarah and the "damsel in distress" is the baby brother. Here you've got a girl who makes a faustian deal and because she never thought it through, regrets it. She's then sent on this trail of redemption, all the while hitting these pitfalls, which challenge her character. Both morally and physically(intellectually/emotionally/spiritually)
In the end, she sheds her childhood taking responsibility for things, which is seen in the metaphor of her passing the teddy bear on to her brother, the object of her disdain to begin with.

what did I learn? Life can be easy but not always fair
 
What that Movie Inspired Me to Do...Guess what? It's 80's day! At lest on my blog. On my blog and my friend Heather's blog.(All Roads Lead To The Kitchen)  We were chatting about our favourite movies from the 1980's when we were both a million years younger, and got it in our heads to do another one of these just the two of us. (You might remember we both did our takes on the Cher movie Mermaids back few months ago) The big twist this time is; neither of us has yet to tell the other what movie from the 80's we took our inspiration from.

Obviously, Labyrinth was my pick. So my notes on this film were - mushrooms (the all eyes creatures in the wall of the labyrinth) tea, sausages, pig, chicken, beer, cheese and crackers, cake (mentioned) turkey (the hat) chili (the song Chilly Down) peach, BBQ (again during the song Chilly Down) berries (mentioned) ambrosia salad (one of the dog's name is Ambrosius) wine, lobster (one of the masks in the ballroom scene) grapes, pears, apples, "sugar cookies" (her dress in the ballroom scene) "popcorn" (the strings of pearls in the ballroom scene) onions and cucumber, pasta

I took my inspiration from the forest dance scene, where the Fireys are singing "Chilly Down" and made chili.  Yep, the crazy little red fuzzy dudes are called Fireys; which I didn't know until I re-watched it earlier and actually watched the credits. All these years I thought they were called Foggies. I seriously thought the lyrics said "chilly down chilly down with the Foggies" but it seems I've been wrong.



The baseline of my chili was sloppy joes, made with veggie soy-meat, sloppy joe mix, tomato paste and water.

So basically, follow the directions on the sloppy joe package.

That only took about two minutes, from there I added half a chopped onion, some chopped green peppers, some chopped mushrooms, one can of red kidney beans, salt, ground black pepper, minced garlic, half cup of pasta uncooked, some crushed red pepper flakes, and about a half cup of cheesed diced.

I let that all simmer together for about twenty minutes, just long enough for the beans to soften and the pasta to cook.


I have to say, I haven't watched this in years, so re-watching it had me singing along, laughing and just as giddy at my age as it did 30 years ago when I was 12. David Bowie was one of my favourite singers and actors, and I always thought he had such a mysterious quality to him.
The character of the Goblin King, looks like a cross between a member of Motley Crue and a vampire. There is just this seductive witchiness to him, that you don't see too often in films anymore.
 Now, I'm off to see what movie inspired Heather on her blog...

Saturday, April 9, 2016

year 5 day 121

movie: This Must Be The Place
starring: Sean Penn, Frances McDormand
genre; Drama,
year: 2011
format; Netflix Canada

plot: A former rockstar finds himself on a road trip of revenge after the death of his father.

This is sort of a go nowhere inner journey film. The lead character spends the first half of the film just trying to get through day to day stuff, before learning his father has died. This causes him to travel half way across the world from Ireland to the U.S. after the funeral, he learns that his father was once tortured in WWII, and decides for some reason to hunt down the last known nazi war criminal for revenge. From that point on, he sort of floats around from place to place "following the clues" meeting people related to his intended victim.

I'm not sure what the point of having Penn's character speaking really slowly in hushed strain your ears tones was, but it made the film feel about a year longer than it really was. The only thing I can think of is that they were trying to make it seem like he'd really gotten messed up from all the years of drugs. The end has him show up at a friend's place having finally removed his goth look. The message I'm supposing to that, is just because something tragic happens, it doesn't mean you have to be stuck in that moment for the rest of your life. There is a scene where he breaks into the guy's house, drinks all his alcohol and then sees a large Buffalo which made no sense to me. I don't know if the Buffalo was a metaphor or a dream or really suppose to be there?

what did I learn? If you see a Buffalo standing outside your window be the tree.

Tuesday, April 5, 2016

The Nosferatu Adventures s10 p7

The Nosferatu Adventures 
page 255, chapter 255

2024
Darkest Forest ...

Reuben walked into the large room not bothering to knock. He didn't need to, Victor had sensed him coming down the hall. Straightening up to his full height, the sandy blonde male barely gazed over his shoulder at the shapeshifter. "Need something?" Victor's words dripped off his lips like melted honey. Only Reuben knew there was nothing sweet about it. The werewolf sniffed as he crossed the threshold dragging a finger across everything silently marking some territory.

"Damen's outside with Harker. He's asking if he can have burgers for supper?"

"I'm afraid I've already sent the maid to the market, it will be her choice what we are having, but I'll make sure tomorrow burgers are on the menu if he's still interested." Victor replied, his tone softening just a little. "Damn, it's good to be back." he turned rubbing his hands together. Bacchus had mysteriously decided to remove the barrier between Rolf's Kingdom and the Darkest Forest, after nine years. The ban on vampiric creatures in the Darkest Forest was once again lifted. Not only was Damen who was half banshee, Victor who was an incubus, but Rolf who shared his actual soul with our heroine, had all been unable to cross into the forest for almost a decade.  Now Victor stood once again in his castle the dust and cobwebs a strangely comforting sight.  Reuben sneezed.

Picking up a discarded corset, Reuben snarled sniffing it. "I see Bryon took good care of the place over the years." tossing the article of clothing across the room, the werewolf sneezed again. "Little zombie prince..."he sneezed twice more. "...sss." Reuben shook his head his eyes wide, his very delicate werewolf senses over run with dust and mold.

"Did you just call him a princess?" Victor asked pouring himself first a scotch then deciding to hand it over to Reuben instead.

"Not on purpose." he downed the drink in one swallow. "Speaking of self proclaimed royalty. Don't you think it's a bit odd that the Queen has never tried to overtake Rolf's kingdom? I mean, there was nothing holding back him and his army for the last nine years. The magick barrier didn't effect humans, or werewolves for that matter. I've crossed back and forth between the two kingdoms hundreds of times."

Victor shook his head downing a drink of his own. "Actually, it's never crossed my mind." he smirked pouring another drink. Making a noise that fell somewhere between disgust and satisfaction, the older male shivered. "The poor fellow hasn't had much luck with lycanthropes though has he? Both his advisers were bitten, turned. Hell, his own father the King is a werewolf. What chance would the Queen stand if he sent his men up against not just another army, but one commanded by another werewolf? He no longer has a witch in his pocket. A bunch of humans going against shapeshifters unprotected without a witch's magick. No one is that stupid." Victor turned a half step, scratching at his left hand mindlessly, his eyes locked somewhere over the edge of Reuben's head. The older male could feel a shift in the air almost as if the room was beginning to close in around them. Smiling to himself, he licked his lips, angling his chin so that the soft light from the window caught the curve of his cheekbone. "You can breathe you know. Just because I look like my nephew, doesn't mean I'll react like him. At lest I hope not." the sandy blonde said seductively as he leaned back against the large bookshelf, one knee crooked. "You miss him don't you?" he asked rubbing the tip of his thumb over his bottom lip. "Best friend, love of your life, pack alpha. But the banshee got to him first." he made a sound as he closed his eyes for a long second. "You can think about it all you want, don't even pretend you're not." Victor brought his right hand up between them making little circles in the air. "I'm an incubus remember. I feed off desires. And right now, you're like a walking neon sign."

"Doctor Frankenstein!" a voice called to him from down the hall intertwined with the heavily urgent footfalls of one of the servants. "Doctor Fran...oh there you are." the large woman said placing a hand on her throat, her eyes never leaving Victor. Reuben shook his head as a half smile crossed his lips. The servant's body temperature having rising a few notches, causing her scent to be that much sweeter.

"Here I am." the sandy blonde male echoed mockingly. "What is it this time?"

Meanwhile...

Out of Time

The redheaded male left his hiding place from behind the dumpster, as he watched the coroner toss his cigarette and head back into the building. Quickly, he grabbed the door before it closed, making sure to keep out of view. He counted to ten before entering the darkened hallway, ever mindful of the security camera at the mid-way point in the hallway. Ducking into the nearest exit, he crouched down under the edge of the little framed window in the middle of the door. Letting out a deep breath, he closed his eyes nodding to himself before reaching over to pull the emergency alarm. Quentin figured he had about five minutes, seven if he was really lucky, to get down the hall and to the morgue, get the body and get out. Seeing the few staff members run past him, he slipped out of his hiding spot, making a run for the room they'd just abandoned.

There were three fresh bodies that had just been brought in within the last few hours. None of them were who he was looking for, and that forced him to start opening the drawers. "Come on man, talk to me. Where are you?" he whispered to the room. "What was that?" he whispered again as he could have sworn he heard something banging, causing him to stop cold his hands out at his sides fingers spread. There was something about the far left drawer that grabbed his attention. Opening it, Quentin smiled wide. "Come on we need to get you out of here." Reaching into the bag he was carrying, he felt the warn dog eared cover of the book about teenaged vampires as he grabbed the clothes he'd brought just in case. "And it's a full moon tonight bub." he continued to drag the body out of the drawer, realizing he didn't have time to get him dressed. Tossing him over his shoulder, he hauled him out the nearest window.

Few hours later...

Edric felt as if his lungs were collapsing in on him. Opening his mouth, he made a noise that was something between a gasp for air and a silent scream. He couldn't move, his arms were pinned to his sides. Panic started to spread through him, clutching at the base of his spine before entwining itself up to his throat. The noise that seemed to fill every molecule around him was driving him insane. Pounding in his ears, feeling like a drum solo was exploding behind his eyes. Edric could feel his heart beating triple the speed, every bone every muscle in his body ripping in pain. He needed to get out. To get up, to stretch, his body didn't feel right, his skin suddenly on fire.

Quentin jumped, blinking as he tucked his shoulders in, raising one knee instinctively. The banging on the metal safe he'd been sitting in front of, freaked him out. The door began to dent from the inside, one rounded fist shape after another, followed by what he assumed were knee prints. Within seconds, the door flew open sending a horrible echoing through the empty warehouse, as it ripped clean off its hinges. Edric let out a scream that wasn't completely human nor was it completely animalistic either.  Before he had a chance to think, Quentin found himself face to face with Edric. Well, almost face to face, as Quentin had erected a small fence between himself and the overturned safe. One made completely of silver chains and barbed wire.  Leaning closer, his hands clawed talons, saliva dripping from his bottom fangs, snarling, his eyes the amber-grey of the wolf, Edric grabbed a hold of the fence. Howling in agony he let go doubling over his palms smoking.

"Easy now. We've got all night." Quentin remarked trying to keep the fear out of his voice. "I left you something over there." he gestured gently towards a table that had a few bottles of water, and a canned ham. "Sunrise is in three hours. So what do you say we just chill out here till then huh?" he ran his hand over his mouth, suddenly feeling his throat go dry. He waited, but Edric said nothing as he continued to down the water, tossing the canned ham across the room. Spinning around, the new werewolf snarled again as he ran both hands through his hair, smoothing it into a limp mohawk. Glancing at his own hands, his breath coming out in sharp jagged gasps, his eyebrows knitted together in confusion.

"What happened?" he spoke around the fangs garbling his words, slurring them.  Quentin said nothing just nodded towards the paperback about the teenaged vampires and werewolves, sitting on a shelf few feet from them.

"I think you're totally howling at the moon." he replied sitting back down on his side of the silver fence, reaching for a box of cookies. "Gingersnap?"


Tune in again for another installment of the Nosferatu Adventures starring your heroine...me(straight up story. So can you tell who my two new wrestling crushes are???)

year 5 day 120

movie: Jamon Jamon
starring: Penelope Cruz, Javier Bardem
genre:Comedy, Drama
year:1992
format: online

plot: after telling her boyfriend she's pregnant, a young girl ends up having an affair with another man, who she later finds out is having an affair with her boyfriend's mother.

I was about fifteen minutes into it when I realized, I'd seen it before. Like 20 years ago when I was in college, but still I'd seen it before.
It's main themes are obsession, betrayal, lust, and the lack of empowerment.
I have no idea what was up with the death of all the pets? And I have to say, I was struck speechless with the scene where the one character shoves a garlic clove up the butt of the pet pig.
The whole film seemed to have a Shakespeare tragedy vibe going on.

There is some full frontal male nudity happening, a male masturbation scene though inter cut with a weird dance with a parrot. This really has a art film flare to it, but given it was done in the early 1990's when strange and abstract was the thing, it sort of fits. At the same time, it gets bit bogged down with it's own style. There were moments when I felt like I was watching pea soup, everything just muddled together without any coherent plan.
And everyone is sleeping with someone they really shouldn't be. The Cruz character is torn between two men, the boyfriend who's having an affair with I think it's her aunt who is a hooker (I got confused on who was who) and the boyfriend's mother is having the affair with the other man that the lead character is also having the affair with. Meanwhile, the boyfriend's dad is becoming obsessed with her, and that's who she seeks comfort with in the end. Sort of as the final scene is heavy in religious themes.

This was originally the April selection for Food n'Flix, but this month's host after viewing it for the first time, decided it was too risque for the overly delicate minds of some of the other group members. I'd already watched it and done the homework, and had a menu picked out, so I'm little bitter we didn't go ahead with it. So here are my notes on the food - ham, salami sandwich,"sausage and mashed potatoes" (the opening underwear scene) "oxtail soup" (there is a big sign of a bull in cut out form) omlettes, pop, cake mix, eggs, pasta, gin, lemon, garlic, coffee, salt, paella, wine, banana, papaya, mango, bread, tomatoes, sunflower seeds, potatoes, onions, oil, escargot, juice, olives, angel food cake, roasted pig. -  I had planned on doing a pulled pork sandwich on garlic bagels inspired by the male masturbation scene and the fact the Bardem character has an obsession with garlic. 

what did I learn? Lust and desire for anything can make anyone loose their resolve.

Monday, April 4, 2016

Coffee Talk/Night Bleeds April 4th 2016

It's that time of the month again, where I come in and just give a shout out to the Food n'Flix host for the month. And this month, my lovely Spudguns!, it's Heather from All Roads Lead To The Kitchen. and her selection is Tampopo.

Night Bleeds Official Announcement Post

The all vampire book/movie club is doing Vampire$ by John Steakley and the movie based on it John Carpenter's Vampires this month. Watch the movie, read the book, blog about it, and if either or both inspire you to cook/bake/do a craft, then add that to your post. 

Deadline - Sunday April 24th (it's always the last Sunday of the month unless stated) with a round up the next day. 

The post must be for the current month (April 2016) and you must link your post to this announcement post, or the Night Bleeds page. Then leave a comment/link on either here or the actual post day, letting me know you joined in.

As always, if you're in the Thunder Bay area and would like to be part of the physical book club, then let me know.

year 5 day 119

movie: Playing for Keeps
starring: Gerard Butler, Jessica Biel
genre:Drama, Comedy,
year:2012
format:Netflix Canada

plot:When a former soccer player decides to coach his son's local team, he finds himself the center of attention from all the soccer moms.

As good as an actor as Butler is, he can't seem to get a handle on the romantic genre. It might be the leads they are pairing him with, as there just doesn't seem to be any kind of chemistry at all, making the jokes less than workable.

The only workable joke is the running gag that everyone looks at the building he's living in, and assumes the whole building is his house, when in fact he's just renting the smaller guest house. At the heart of this, is a guy still in love with his exwife, who is about to marry someone new. That's really all this story is, and how the Butler character reacts to the news.

what did I learn? I don't think I learned anything this time around, it all just seemed to dull my senses.

Sunday, April 3, 2016

year 5 day 118

movie: She's Funny That Way
starring: Rhys Ifans, Imogen Poots
genre:Drama, Comedy
year:2014
format:Netflix Canada

plot: a call girl is offered a lead in a broadway play, as a call girl. Along the way, she ends up leaving a trail of confused affairs.

The title is misleading. The vibe is that of a Woody Allen film, but it's in fact not one of his.
You've got the character of the play's director who has the affair with the call girl, of which is not his first. When his wife finds out, she has an affair with one of the male leads in the play, and we learn he's been with as many of the call girls as his buddy has. Then the call girl dates the play's writer, while being stalked by this guy and his therapist; who it ends up is the girlfriend of the writer. Everyone is tangled within everyone elses life.

It's like watching ten years worth of a soap opera on fast forward, trying to follow the connect the dots in this film. And the worst part is, it's not even funny.  Lines that should have had you doubled over laughing fell flat. Which is really sad given half of the cast are normally wickedly funny, with perfect comedic timing.  I am putting it down to wrong casting here. There was almost no chemistry among the leads.

what did I learn? You just can't get it right all the time.

Saturday, April 2, 2016

year 5 day 117

movie: Tenacious D and the Pick of Destiny
starring: Jack Black, Kyle Gass
genre:Comedy, Music,
year:2006
format: Netflix Canada

plot:When a couple of guys learn that the one thing that made all their rock heroes great was the same guitar pick, they decide to steal it from the rock n roll museum. Only they've found themselves in the ultimate rock off with the devil himself.

On more than one occasion I've literally said I've had no interest in this film. I've passed on it countless times over the years. I have no clue what possessed me to watch it today?

I do love Jack Black, and I love those devil/heavy metal stories. Only, this one really falls short. This is a bad buddy movie that should have been so much better than it was. Given the fact Tim Robbins and John C. Reilly both have small roles in this, should have in itself made this movie worth something. There was so much that could have been done with the Robbins character, but he was underused. Reilly's character though in a dream sequence, could have led to something bigger/better than what was given him. This film goes nowhere and does nothing. Not too mention the lack of Meat Loaf. Here you have one of the best rock actors on the planet and he was reduced to 30 seconds of air time.

Here you have a character who is suppose to be sort of nerdy innocent in his love for music, that he believes everything told to him. Once he figures out he's actually the talented brains of the operation, he still sticks with the con artist. It just felt like a very unbalanced comedy duo, and would have been better if it had been just Jack Black.

what did I learn? You can make anything sound like a Manowar album.

Friday, April 1, 2016

year 5 day 116

movie: Mad Max
starring: Mel Gibson, Hugh Keays-Byrne
genre: Action, Crime, Drama,
year:1979
format: TV Edit

plot: After a member of a biker gang is accidentally killed in a high speed chase, a feud begins between the gang and the local highway patrol.

So if I wasn't crazy about the other two in the series, why'd I bother? Cause I'm one of those people that once I see any part of a series I need to finish the whole thing. 

I was bored. I don't know what I was expecting, but a basic cop revenge story wasn't it. I see where the basic cop revenge dramas sort of got their momentum, and I see where the whole Fast and Furious lets do everything on the road genre came from.  I don't know how long the original movie was, but watching it on tv, it was more commercials than movie.
So the dog wanders off at one point and no one mentions him again. The kid is there for one scene in the beginning, then not mentioned for half of it till he pops up conveniently in the car during the vacation. And the dude who gets arse jacked is running without issues thirty seconds after a gang has all taken a turn on him.  I give you plot holes.

I felt like it was missing something, and it might have been given it was a tv edit? It was almost like nothing really happened till the last ten minutes, as if the first hour and 45 minutes were the intro.

what did I learn? The average tv commercial gets replayed 10 times per show.