The Nosferatu Adventures
Page 7, Chapter 7
Our heroine picked up her vampire themed lunchbox and binder, turned towards Rolf and said thank you, as she started to walk away from the very large werewolf. That was until she got about four steps, then the very large werewolf grabbed her by the back of the neck and tossed her backwards. She hit the tree knocking all the air out of her.
"Where do you think you're going?" Rolf asked.
"That-a-way. Yonder." she held up the lunchbox pointing right to what she believed was the North.
"No. You are sitting right there until the others come back."
"But why? You lot killed me, gave me teeth for slaughtering innocent bunnies and stuff so I should be able to handle anything...why are you laughing?" our not so brave heroine slumped forward, the lunchbox smashing into her knee.
"We still haven't figured out what you are now. Which means, it's more dangerous for you then it was when you were still ..." he crossed his arms over his massive chest, this look of complete stone on his face. "...alive. Human, whatever. The forest is the last place you want to be alone."
"Look, werewolf boy, I'm tired of captain furball over there..." she gestured again with her lunchbox towards the right. "...and his half naked evil trickster routine. And why three? How is this a job for three werewolves huh? Escorting one little old me through some trees?"
"Wolves are community creatures." he shrugged. "There really isn't such a thing as a lone wolf, it's a myth." Just as he said that, both Reuben and Dagan returned soaking from having been in the lake. Reuben grinned at her, his eyes still that of the werewolf as he held out his hand.
"Check this out." he let the necklace dangle in front of her face, smacking into her nose. "See that, how it shines in the light from the campfire. Mermaid scales. Isn't it pretty?" the five scales were the size of quarters as they caught the light, reflecting back in a metallic copper. "Made it myself. See, Dagan here isn't the only one who's got a good eye for crafting." he burped.
"My god, did you eat a Mermaid?" Rolf asked.
"No. She was dead already. Crashed up on some rocks, half her fins shredded. I'm not a monster." he let his eyes turn back to the chocolate brown of a human male. "Okay, yeah technically I am but Mermaids, poisonous to us. I'm not stupid." he put the necklace on before turning from his friend and heading back down the path.
"He seems angry." our heroine commented.
"He's always like that. I think he was hoping you'd be pretty." Dagan remarked half turned from her. He let out a sound that was half scream half howl as he moved from our heroine, his arm crimson. "You bit me!"
"Now, we're even." she licked her lips, his blood sticky and thick. "Typical male, you look better then you taste." Dagan took a step towards her, his eyes glowing in anger, his hair now falling into his face. Rolf put one massively strong arm out grabbing at his buddy.
"You did deserve it." he laughed at Dagan. "Come on, you're already healing. She didn't even do any real damage." the smile never left his face.
"She bit me! I may need a tetanus shot." Dagan's voice rose a few notches.
"You're immune to everything, you don't need a tetanus shot." Rolf continued to laugh.
"But we still have no idea what she is." he pointed with his now totally healed arm towards her. "Oh wait, hang on her eyes just changed." The two wolves took a half step closer to our heroine, noticing that her normally hazel eyes had become white. Completely white, the pupils disappearing. "Fangs and white eyes." Dagan's face lit up as he smirked. "I think you're a Banshee." he ran his hand through his hair fixing it. "Scream." he poked her in the ribs. "Scream for me." he poked her in the ribs again. "Come on, you let out a crazy loud scream earlier after I had killed you. Scream." Dagan was getting impatient with our heroine.
She shook her head, her eyes going back to normal. "No. Don't want to. But..." she licked her lips again, the smell of his blood still hot in the air. "...I wouldn't mind another bite."
"Aren't Banshee's a type of vampire?" they all turned to see Reuben had returned, his shirt missing. There were large claw marks running from his shoulder to his waist.
"What happened to you?" Dagan asked.
"Cougar. That I did eat."
"Insert dirty joke." our heroine mumbled as she walked past him. "I don't think I'll get used to this werewolf speed you guys have.You said when they got back I could leave. Leaving." she brought the binder up to cover her view of the half naked Reuben as she continued on down the path. "You guys really need to put some shirts on, you're hurting my new eyes." She continued to walk alone, following the sounds of frogs for about an hour till she got to the lake. "Doesn't look that deep at this one spot." she went to take a step across but found herself unable. She moved her foot, and ended up just standing there, in mid step. Hesitating.
"You're still here. Thought you would have been off getting killed again by something worse then us by now." Dagan's voice echoed in the trees around her. Taking a step back from the edge of the lake, our heroine looked behind her to see the three werewolves slowly stalking towards her.
"Give me a minute and I will. Be off somewhere you're not." she took another step, loosing her balance falling first forward, then bounced backward stumbling back a step. "Someone put a force field around the water. How am I suppose to get to the other side?"
"You can't. And it's not a force field. You can't cross running water." Rolf said. "You should know this. Don't you have that written in your little notebook there." he gestured to her binder as he walked up beside her taking it from her. He flipped through it. "Right here, ways to trap a vampire. Seeds, running water, roses. Reuben's right, Banshee's are a classification of vamp. Congratulations, you got what you wanted."
"Be careful what you wish for, you just might get it." Reuben said coming up on the right of her smiling, sticking his tongue out at her, as he once again put his hair up in a too smooth to be human ponytail. She made a noise deep in her throat that was suppose to be a growl but sounded more like a bad cough that she was suppressing. "Yeah no." Reuben put his hand on her forehead. "You're trying to growl from here. You need to growl from here." he moved his hand to the hollow of her throat. "You're over thinking it. Cute try though, very scary." he winked smiling still.
"How am I going to get across the lake?"
"You're not. Not while the stream is running." Rolf remarked. Turning the very large werewolf found a tree about two feet wide and managed to uproot it. Tossing it like it was nothing, the trunk of it landed in the water near a shallow point, splashing the rest of them. Rolf then let out a roar that scared some of the animals nearby. Two more rabbits darted past them, grabbing Reuben's attention. "Dams, not just for beavers anymore."
Tune in later for another installment of the Nosferatu Adventures starring your heroine...me (yeah, another straight up bit of the story, but what can I say, I really dig these wolves.)
Sunday, June 30, 2013
Saturday, June 29, 2013
Year 2 Mid-Season Rest of the Story 6
The Nosferatu Adventures
Page 6, Chapter 6
Our heroine, found herself struggling to understand what was going on. That, and to not accidentally bite her tongue now that she had some fancy new fangs.
"Okay, how many times are you going to make me ask about this queen?" our not so brave heroine asked as she started to squeeze the water out of her t-shirt.
"Uh, you might want to just replace it." Rolf commented pointing to the tear in the back of her clothes from where Dagan had severed her spine. "Here." he grabbed a handful of ashes from the campfire, cupped them in his hands chanting. Opening the palm of his hand, he revealed what looked like a small crinkled bit of fabric. Blowing on it, the fabric stretched about two inches, leaving what looked like a large handkerchief flapping in the wind. "See what you can do with that?" he held it up in front of her.
"Huh yeah. I'd say nothing really." she replied.
"Just believe that you can." Rolf continued to hold it out to her, a smile on his face. "Have some faith."
Taking the small square of fabric, our heroine let out a deep sigh wishing her shirt was fixed. A spark appeared, the material disappearing in a puff of smoke, as the smoke seemed to twist then around her body. She let out a small squeal as the damaged shirt she had been wearing was suddenly replaced by a nice new grey one the colour of the ash.
"See, just needed to believe."Dagan remarked. "And as you get better at it, the fancier you can get." he gestured towards her. "Add some lace at the neckline." Rolf looked at his friend raising an eyebrow. "What? Just cause I killed her I can't give fashion advice? She's not holding something as tiny as ripping her spine in half against me." his left hand was now on her shoulder. "We're friends, pals, buddies even." moving his hand up he patted her on the top of her hair. "Right. I mean, what's a little carnage between friends?" his eyes were still that of the werewolf, as he smiled at her. (get ready for the links for the flashbacks) "Right? Good talk. I'm going to go take a Shower or something. Cause I'm feeling a bit gross." He moved from them in a flash heading down towards the lake.
"He's a Puzzle, I know, but trust me when I say he's a decent guy once you get to know him. Bit of a rough Card, but still." Rolf stretched flicking his long hair out of his face. "Besides, now that you have died, that evil Rock hard exterior will melt away."
Tune in later for another installment of the Nosferatu Adventures, starring your heroine...me.
Page 6, Chapter 6
Our heroine, found herself struggling to understand what was going on. That, and to not accidentally bite her tongue now that she had some fancy new fangs.
"Okay, how many times are you going to make me ask about this queen?" our not so brave heroine asked as she started to squeeze the water out of her t-shirt.
"Uh, you might want to just replace it." Rolf commented pointing to the tear in the back of her clothes from where Dagan had severed her spine. "Here." he grabbed a handful of ashes from the campfire, cupped them in his hands chanting. Opening the palm of his hand, he revealed what looked like a small crinkled bit of fabric. Blowing on it, the fabric stretched about two inches, leaving what looked like a large handkerchief flapping in the wind. "See what you can do with that?" he held it up in front of her.
"Huh yeah. I'd say nothing really." she replied.
"Just believe that you can." Rolf continued to hold it out to her, a smile on his face. "Have some faith."
Taking the small square of fabric, our heroine let out a deep sigh wishing her shirt was fixed. A spark appeared, the material disappearing in a puff of smoke, as the smoke seemed to twist then around her body. She let out a small squeal as the damaged shirt she had been wearing was suddenly replaced by a nice new grey one the colour of the ash.
"See, just needed to believe."Dagan remarked. "And as you get better at it, the fancier you can get." he gestured towards her. "Add some lace at the neckline." Rolf looked at his friend raising an eyebrow. "What? Just cause I killed her I can't give fashion advice? She's not holding something as tiny as ripping her spine in half against me." his left hand was now on her shoulder. "We're friends, pals, buddies even." moving his hand up he patted her on the top of her hair. "Right. I mean, what's a little carnage between friends?" his eyes were still that of the werewolf, as he smiled at her. (get ready for the links for the flashbacks) "Right? Good talk. I'm going to go take a Shower or something. Cause I'm feeling a bit gross." He moved from them in a flash heading down towards the lake.
"He's a Puzzle, I know, but trust me when I say he's a decent guy once you get to know him. Bit of a rough Card, but still." Rolf stretched flicking his long hair out of his face. "Besides, now that you have died, that evil Rock hard exterior will melt away."
Tune in later for another installment of the Nosferatu Adventures, starring your heroine...me.
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Friday, June 28, 2013
That rock for you
Rented the movie Get Him To The Greek on Shaw Video On Demand this afternoon. And I have to say, it was a lot better then I was expecting it to be.
The more I see Russel Brand in stuff, the more he grows on me. So, the 2010 film is about a rock star who has pretty much hit the bottom of his career and ends up doing a comeback on the anniversary of his last hit concert. The handler for him, has three days to get him from London to L.A. for the concert, and along the way, drunken stupidity happens.
What I liked about this buddy movie, was that it showed that no matter how big our idols are, they are still human.
The more I see Russel Brand in stuff, the more he grows on me. So, the 2010 film is about a rock star who has pretty much hit the bottom of his career and ends up doing a comeback on the anniversary of his last hit concert. The handler for him, has three days to get him from London to L.A. for the concert, and along the way, drunken stupidity happens.
What I liked about this buddy movie, was that it showed that no matter how big our idols are, they are still human.
Thursday, June 27, 2013
This your card?
movie: Now You See Me (2013)
where?: Cinema
reason to see it: It looked cool
plot: Four street magicians down on their luck are brought together with one goal, to take down a corporation that wronged millions of people.
This was a brilliant film. A thinking man's movie. girl's movie. Woody Harrelson, Morgan Freeman, Mark Ruffalo, Michael Caine,and Jesse Eisenberg.
Again, it was more of a cop drama that happened to have stage magic as it's baseline, which is why I think it worked so well.
There was a twist ending that even I didn't see coming, and hints at one plotline being open ended. Could a sequel be in store?
where?: Cinema
reason to see it: It looked cool
plot: Four street magicians down on their luck are brought together with one goal, to take down a corporation that wronged millions of people.
This was a brilliant film. A thinking
Again, it was more of a cop drama that happened to have stage magic as it's baseline, which is why I think it worked so well.
There was a twist ending that even I didn't see coming, and hints at one plotline being open ended. Could a sequel be in store?
Wednesday, June 26, 2013
A puzzle or two
It was another movie day at mom's. We rented on Shaw Video On Demand, Jack Reacher and The Incredible Burt Wonderstone.
The Incredible Burt Wonderstone. Is a comedy starring Steve Carell and Jim Carrey. It's about this Vegas magician who finds himself out of a job and his new rival who is more of a stunt man then a magician in the typical sense.
I liked it. I have rarely seen anything by these two actors that I haven't liked. This is a pair I'd love to see team up again.
Jack Reacher, stars Tom Cruise, and is based on the mystery/spy novel. There isn't much to say about this without giving the whole movie away. Basically, he plays a former military cop turned semi-bounty hunter and is called in to help solve a case.
I'm surprised at how much I really liked this film, given I'm not a fan of his. This movie reminded me more of an episode of NCIS then anything else I've seen movie wise in a long time.
till later
The Incredible Burt Wonderstone. Is a comedy starring Steve Carell and Jim Carrey. It's about this Vegas magician who finds himself out of a job and his new rival who is more of a stunt man then a magician in the typical sense.
I liked it. I have rarely seen anything by these two actors that I haven't liked. This is a pair I'd love to see team up again.
Jack Reacher, stars Tom Cruise, and is based on the mystery/spy novel. There isn't much to say about this without giving the whole movie away. Basically, he plays a former military cop turned semi-bounty hunter and is called in to help solve a case.
I'm surprised at how much I really liked this film, given I'm not a fan of his. This movie reminded me more of an episode of NCIS then anything else I've seen movie wise in a long time.
till later
Thursday, June 20, 2013
What that movie inspired me to do #9
Do you remember the scene where Jacob gives Bella the dream catcher? It was a sweet gift that he made himself, and let's be honest, most real guys wouldn't even think to buy you something as thoughtful or original as that, let alone spend the time to make one themselves.
Unless of course they've seen the film and were smart enough to copy cat the wolfboy.
Anyways, I spotted a kit at the dollar store the other day, and me, in my ultimate wisdom thought "Cool! How damned hard can it be to knot some string around a wreath?" And the package did say it was for ages 7 and up, so really how difficult could it be to make one?
Two days, a mouth full of dye (don't ask) flying feathers, knotted string that would not do anything but twist around it's self in the wrong direction, a lost sewing needle (shoes are needed till I find the damned thing) and beads that I swear rolled everywhere; and I have this.
My own Twilight New Moon inspired dream catcher. It's hideous and crooked but it's mine. I made it. I chose the red kit with the idea of vampires, but used the feathers from a tan coloured kit. I have other plans for the second kit. Thought the silvery beads would add some "sparkle" to it.
Somewhere there is a group of 7 year olds with better hand -eye coordination, sitting laughing at me while they create bucketfuls of perfect dream catchers with lots of pretty charms.
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Year 2 Mid-Season the Rest of the Story 5
Nosferatu Adventures
Page 5, Chapter 5
Our heroine found herself nodding to herself mumbling, not really listening to what the large werewolf was warning her about.
"I don't suppose there's a pizza place anywhere around here?" she asked not bothering to wait for any kind of response, because she knew they would just laugh hysterically at her. She started to wander, following the stream for about fifteen minutes before spotting Reuben hanging upside down by the knees from a large tree.
"What took you so long?" he laughed as he jumped down landing in a shoulder roll. "I was getting tired of just hanging around waiting for you." He smiled, his eyes flashing that of the werewolf.
"Don't do that." our heroine turned slightly dropping her binder. Bending to pick it up she saw flames coming from just behind the tree.
"Vampires and Cults. Vampirism and Vegetarianism. Dracula, the Man the Myth and the Monster. What is all this stuff?" Reuben asked, waving a handful of pages around. He turned his eyes up to look at her from under a maple leaf that was stuck to his hair. "Seriously? This is what you're studying? Why?"
"Everyone needs a hobby." she pointed to the leaf that was now stuck to his eyebrow.
"Strange hobby. Why not take up something normal, like knitting or needlepoint or video games?"
"I've tried all three, but my hand-eye coordination is like zero. And I don't have the patience." she said standing back up, putting her notes back into the binder. She couldn't take her eyes off of the maple leaf that was just hanging there on the side of his face, like it was glued to his eyebrow. She would have reached over and removed it, but the fact he was a werewolf kept her from doing so. A large cloud of smoke headed in their direction suddenly, making it nearly impossible to see.
"You said something about food?"
"Oh my god. Eating with werewolves, that's a new one. Just hope nobody I know is on the menu." she mumbled as she tried to see where she was walking, following the source of the smoke. Our heroine was coughing from it, by the time it took her to get the few feet to where the three werewolves had set up a small eating area. "That smells like...gingerbread? What's going on here?"
"Tea?" Dagan asked opening a picnic basket and holding up what was clearly a thermos of Earl Grey. "Seriously..." he said chewing on something crunchy. "Somethings are better hot, tea is one of them. Sit." he grabbed her arm making her sit on the tree stump.
"Want me to shake a paw too?" she asked. She nearly jumped out of her skin again when he growled at her. "Sorry, bad joke." She heard more crunching, this time from Rolf. Turning our heroine leaned closer to the large werewolf trying to see what it was that was hanging out of his mouth, and nearly fell into the campfire.
"What are you staring at?" he asked, as a thin line disappeared into his mouth. Reaching into a second picnic basket, he smiled wide just before dropping a small mouse into his mouth. "You're acting like you just saw a ghost or something. It's just adoor mouse field mouse. Surprisingly tasty."
"Tea?" Dagan asked again. Turning, she saw he had a spindle of string suddenly, wrapping it around a bent branch.
"What are you making?" she asked as a large piece of gingerbread seemed to be shoved under her nose. She barely glanced to see that it was being handed to her by Reuben.
"Dream catcher. I make these all the time." Dagan replied, his hands moving almost too fast for our heroine to see. Within seconds he had the string weaved through like a perfect spiderweb, with tiny gleaming pearl white charms dangling from it. Holding up his prize, our not so brave heroine realized they were bones not charms.
Our heroine burst out laughing once again. "Okay now that's a cliche. Werewolf making a dream catcher."
"Uh oh." Rolf started to shake his head flicking his hair out of his face. "You might not want to go there."
"I think she just did." Reuben said laughing himself as he grabbed the thermos.
"So tell me about this Queen?" our heroine said breaking into the gingerbread. "Why does she have you shaking in your magically painted on boots?"
"Did anyone say the Queen was a she? We just said Queen." Dagan replied. Our heroine nearly choked on her gingerbread. "You going to die on us? Cause if you die on us then we get to go home." he said, a smirk on his face. "Then again, we'd have to bury you and make sure you don't return as a zombie or something and that would take more time in the long run then just getting you through to the edge of the forest."
"So the Queen. And why exactly did the Magic Ninjas send you guys? What's the score?" she said as a large puff of smoke drifted towards her from the campfire.
"Well, you know how some people have animal guides or totems?" Rolf said, crunching on what looked like a frog. "It's like that only not, cause..." he leaned over towards the campfire, his elbows on his knees. "You're not human."
"I'm sorry what do you mean? I'm not human?" our not so brave heroine said holding her binder to her once more like armor.
"I'm thinking vampire." Reuben said, a mouthful of marshmallows. "Or witch." he glared at her from under his hair which had now fallen out of the ponytail.
"Na." Dagan said leaning over her shoulder sniffing. "Doesn't smell like a witch. Besides, most witches are better looking." he brought his hand up in front of his face gesturing to his nose. "The glamour spells. You're too ugly." a handful of marshmallows belted him in the face falling everywhere. "Well that wasn't very nice." he said picking up one that had landed in his lap and eating it.
"So you're spirit guides for the supernatural?" she asked turning to face Rolf. That was her first real mistake, turning her back on Dagan. She heard the sound of her spine snapping before she felt it.
"What did you do that for?" Rolf asked. Standing up, he moved around the campfire, looking down at her now dead body.
"Give it a minute." Dagan replied licking the blood of his hand, his one leg twitching. "If she's not human, if she is a vampire or something she'll be back."
"And if she was human, then what do we do?" Rolf asked.
Dagan shrugged. "Bury her I suppose. With a really big tombstone something heavy that she can't move if she goes zombie." he continued to lick the blood from his hand. "Not human." he remarked as his eyes turned to the amber-grey of the werewolf. "Can't place it, but not human. Okay, you babysit the still dead-not dead-dead chick for a bit. I'm going hunting." he turned taking a few steps, the magical clothing melting into the same mist that had created it, then turned into a very large auburn wolf. Dagan disappeared into the darkness of the forest, howling. (see how I followed the rule about introducing something in one part and bringing it back later. The clothes in chapter 3)
"Babysit the dead chick." Rolf laughed as he knelt down beside the dead body of our heroine.
"So he killed her? If she's dead, can we BBQ her? There is a bottle of BBQ sauce in this one picnic basket." Reuben's voice raised a notch. Rolf looked at his buddy, his eyebrows knitted together in disapproval. "I'll take that as a no."
"Didn't you have enough today? I mean, seriously, you already ate that girl with the red cape thingie." Rolf commented pointing towards the picnic baskets. "And the old woman from the house at the end of the road. You really need to cut down on your snacking." There was a sound that made both werewolves ears twitch that sounded almost like dripping wax, followed by a soft cracking noise. Both knew from personal experience that it was the sound of bones realigning. "Heads up, I think she's going to scream." he moved away from our heroine covering his ears.
The scream was loud and filled with shock more then pain. Our heroine was gasping for air as she sat on the ground, covered in leaves and dirt and her own blood trying to understand what just happened.
Rolf helped her to stand up.
"Easy, try to see if your legs are going to work."
"Why...why wouldn't they?" she asked still unable to fully catch her breath.
"Uh, because Dagan severed your spine."
"Wh...why?"
"To prove a point." Reuben added, handing her a bottled water. "That, and I think he was bored."
"Oh good, you're awake." Dagan's voice slithered around her causing her to jump. He stepped out from behind the large tree, half naked and covered in sweat and dirt.
Rolf pointed to his buddy's face. "You got something stuck to you."
Dagan wiped at his face, pulling his hand away clutching a piece of yellow fabric. "Farmer. Or might be Librarian? Okay, whatever you are, this little tea party is over. Time to get back on track." his eyes were still that of the wolf as he grabbed her by the face, his nails like sharp glassy points as he once again forced her to show him her teeth. "Told you, she'd be fanged." The other two men leaned in closer to see the four sharp teeth on her upper row.
"Those don't look vampire." Reuben commented. "They look more...I don't know? But I know they don't look vamp. Check her forehead for bumps." reaching out Reuben smacked her on the face tapping her eyebrows. "Nothing is springing to life, so I don't think she's part of the bumpy forehead crowd. Ears look normal, no points so think it's safe to rule out fairy." grabbing a hold of her shoulders he twisted her around. "No tail either. Goblin is off the list too." he proceeded to pour half the bottled water on her and took a step back. "Not a mermaid either."
"What's left?" Rolf asked pointing at her eyes. "They haven't changed so...we must be forgetting something? I mean, clearly not human."
"Yof arg taltbling lite imf nof herh." she struggled to move from them but the grip Dagan had on her face still prevented that.
"Let her go man." Reuben said. Dagan opened his eyes wide at his friend then let his grip loosen throwing his hands up in the air taking a step back. "What did you say?" Reuben continued.
"You are talking like I'm not here."
"Actually, we were examining you. We need to figure out what you are before we go any farther into this forest. Cause the Queen really doesn't take to kindly to unsanctioned critters in his area." Reuben said scratching at his jaw. "Dude, I really think I got fleas or something. I'm going to head on to the lake and see if that helps." He was gone in a blink towards the left of them.
Tune in later for another installment of the Nosferatu Adventures starring your heroine...me. (yeah another piece that is just straight up story and doesn't have any links to the rest of the movie posts. Seriously, I'm just really having fun writing this now. I'll get back to the purpose of the Nosferatu Adventures in the next chapter.)
Page 5, Chapter 5
Our heroine found herself nodding to herself mumbling, not really listening to what the large werewolf was warning her about.
"I don't suppose there's a pizza place anywhere around here?" she asked not bothering to wait for any kind of response, because she knew they would just laugh hysterically at her. She started to wander, following the stream for about fifteen minutes before spotting Reuben hanging upside down by the knees from a large tree.
"What took you so long?" he laughed as he jumped down landing in a shoulder roll. "I was getting tired of just hanging around waiting for you." He smiled, his eyes flashing that of the werewolf.
"Don't do that." our heroine turned slightly dropping her binder. Bending to pick it up she saw flames coming from just behind the tree.
"Vampires and Cults. Vampirism and Vegetarianism. Dracula, the Man the Myth and the Monster. What is all this stuff?" Reuben asked, waving a handful of pages around. He turned his eyes up to look at her from under a maple leaf that was stuck to his hair. "Seriously? This is what you're studying? Why?"
"Everyone needs a hobby." she pointed to the leaf that was now stuck to his eyebrow.
"Strange hobby. Why not take up something normal, like knitting or needlepoint or video games?"
"I've tried all three, but my hand-eye coordination is like zero. And I don't have the patience." she said standing back up, putting her notes back into the binder. She couldn't take her eyes off of the maple leaf that was just hanging there on the side of his face, like it was glued to his eyebrow. She would have reached over and removed it, but the fact he was a werewolf kept her from doing so. A large cloud of smoke headed in their direction suddenly, making it nearly impossible to see.
"You said something about food?"
"Oh my god. Eating with werewolves, that's a new one. Just hope nobody I know is on the menu." she mumbled as she tried to see where she was walking, following the source of the smoke. Our heroine was coughing from it, by the time it took her to get the few feet to where the three werewolves had set up a small eating area. "That smells like...gingerbread? What's going on here?"
"Tea?" Dagan asked opening a picnic basket and holding up what was clearly a thermos of Earl Grey. "Seriously..." he said chewing on something crunchy. "Somethings are better hot, tea is one of them. Sit." he grabbed her arm making her sit on the tree stump.
"Want me to shake a paw too?" she asked. She nearly jumped out of her skin again when he growled at her. "Sorry, bad joke." She heard more crunching, this time from Rolf. Turning our heroine leaned closer to the large werewolf trying to see what it was that was hanging out of his mouth, and nearly fell into the campfire.
"What are you staring at?" he asked, as a thin line disappeared into his mouth. Reaching into a second picnic basket, he smiled wide just before dropping a small mouse into his mouth. "You're acting like you just saw a ghost or something. It's just a
"Tea?" Dagan asked again. Turning, she saw he had a spindle of string suddenly, wrapping it around a bent branch.
"What are you making?" she asked as a large piece of gingerbread seemed to be shoved under her nose. She barely glanced to see that it was being handed to her by Reuben.
"Dream catcher. I make these all the time." Dagan replied, his hands moving almost too fast for our heroine to see. Within seconds he had the string weaved through like a perfect spiderweb, with tiny gleaming pearl white charms dangling from it. Holding up his prize, our not so brave heroine realized they were bones not charms.
Our heroine burst out laughing once again. "Okay now that's a cliche. Werewolf making a dream catcher."
"Uh oh." Rolf started to shake his head flicking his hair out of his face. "You might not want to go there."
"I think she just did." Reuben said laughing himself as he grabbed the thermos.
"So tell me about this Queen?" our heroine said breaking into the gingerbread. "Why does she have you shaking in your magically painted on boots?"
"Did anyone say the Queen was a she? We just said Queen." Dagan replied. Our heroine nearly choked on her gingerbread. "You going to die on us? Cause if you die on us then we get to go home." he said, a smirk on his face. "Then again, we'd have to bury you and make sure you don't return as a zombie or something and that would take more time in the long run then just getting you through to the edge of the forest."
"So the Queen. And why exactly did the Magic Ninjas send you guys? What's the score?" she said as a large puff of smoke drifted towards her from the campfire.
"Well, you know how some people have animal guides or totems?" Rolf said, crunching on what looked like a frog. "It's like that only not, cause..." he leaned over towards the campfire, his elbows on his knees. "You're not human."
"I'm sorry what do you mean? I'm not human?" our not so brave heroine said holding her binder to her once more like armor.
"I'm thinking vampire." Reuben said, a mouthful of marshmallows. "Or witch." he glared at her from under his hair which had now fallen out of the ponytail.
"Na." Dagan said leaning over her shoulder sniffing. "Doesn't smell like a witch. Besides, most witches are better looking." he brought his hand up in front of his face gesturing to his nose. "The glamour spells. You're too ugly." a handful of marshmallows belted him in the face falling everywhere. "Well that wasn't very nice." he said picking up one that had landed in his lap and eating it.
"So you're spirit guides for the supernatural?" she asked turning to face Rolf. That was her first real mistake, turning her back on Dagan. She heard the sound of her spine snapping before she felt it.
"What did you do that for?" Rolf asked. Standing up, he moved around the campfire, looking down at her now dead body.
"Give it a minute." Dagan replied licking the blood of his hand, his one leg twitching. "If she's not human, if she is a vampire or something she'll be back."
"And if she was human, then what do we do?" Rolf asked.
Dagan shrugged. "Bury her I suppose. With a really big tombstone something heavy that she can't move if she goes zombie." he continued to lick the blood from his hand. "Not human." he remarked as his eyes turned to the amber-grey of the werewolf. "Can't place it, but not human. Okay, you babysit the still dead-not dead-dead chick for a bit. I'm going hunting." he turned taking a few steps, the magical clothing melting into the same mist that had created it, then turned into a very large auburn wolf. Dagan disappeared into the darkness of the forest, howling. (see how I followed the rule about introducing something in one part and bringing it back later. The clothes in chapter 3)
"Babysit the dead chick." Rolf laughed as he knelt down beside the dead body of our heroine.
"So he killed her? If she's dead, can we BBQ her? There is a bottle of BBQ sauce in this one picnic basket." Reuben's voice raised a notch. Rolf looked at his buddy, his eyebrows knitted together in disapproval. "I'll take that as a no."
"Didn't you have enough today? I mean, seriously, you already ate that girl with the red cape thingie." Rolf commented pointing towards the picnic baskets. "And the old woman from the house at the end of the road. You really need to cut down on your snacking." There was a sound that made both werewolves ears twitch that sounded almost like dripping wax, followed by a soft cracking noise. Both knew from personal experience that it was the sound of bones realigning. "Heads up, I think she's going to scream." he moved away from our heroine covering his ears.
The scream was loud and filled with shock more then pain. Our heroine was gasping for air as she sat on the ground, covered in leaves and dirt and her own blood trying to understand what just happened.
Rolf helped her to stand up.
"Easy, try to see if your legs are going to work."
"Why...why wouldn't they?" she asked still unable to fully catch her breath.
"Uh, because Dagan severed your spine."
"Wh...why?"
"To prove a point." Reuben added, handing her a bottled water. "That, and I think he was bored."
"Oh good, you're awake." Dagan's voice slithered around her causing her to jump. He stepped out from behind the large tree, half naked and covered in sweat and dirt.
Rolf pointed to his buddy's face. "You got something stuck to you."
Dagan wiped at his face, pulling his hand away clutching a piece of yellow fabric. "Farmer. Or might be Librarian? Okay, whatever you are, this little tea party is over. Time to get back on track." his eyes were still that of the wolf as he grabbed her by the face, his nails like sharp glassy points as he once again forced her to show him her teeth. "Told you, she'd be fanged." The other two men leaned in closer to see the four sharp teeth on her upper row.
"Those don't look vampire." Reuben commented. "They look more...I don't know? But I know they don't look vamp. Check her forehead for bumps." reaching out Reuben smacked her on the face tapping her eyebrows. "Nothing is springing to life, so I don't think she's part of the bumpy forehead crowd. Ears look normal, no points so think it's safe to rule out fairy." grabbing a hold of her shoulders he twisted her around. "No tail either. Goblin is off the list too." he proceeded to pour half the bottled water on her and took a step back. "Not a mermaid either."
"What's left?" Rolf asked pointing at her eyes. "They haven't changed so...we must be forgetting something? I mean, clearly not human."
"Yof arg taltbling lite imf nof herh." she struggled to move from them but the grip Dagan had on her face still prevented that.
"Let her go man." Reuben said. Dagan opened his eyes wide at his friend then let his grip loosen throwing his hands up in the air taking a step back. "What did you say?" Reuben continued.
"You are talking like I'm not here."
"Actually, we were examining you. We need to figure out what you are before we go any farther into this forest. Cause the Queen really doesn't take to kindly to unsanctioned critters in his area." Reuben said scratching at his jaw. "Dude, I really think I got fleas or something. I'm going to head on to the lake and see if that helps." He was gone in a blink towards the left of them.
Tune in later for another installment of the Nosferatu Adventures starring your heroine...me. (yeah another piece that is just straight up story and doesn't have any links to the rest of the movie posts. Seriously, I'm just really having fun writing this now. I'll get back to the purpose of the Nosferatu Adventures in the next chapter.)
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Wednesday, June 19, 2013
It's all about the shower scene
movie: Hitchcock
where: mom's sofa rented on Shaw Video On Demand
reason: Everyone loves Psycho.
This is a bio-pic about the year or so that Hitchcock and his wife Alma, spent trying to get the studios to let them make the movie Psycho. It shows the delicate balance that their marriage went through, and shows what the real meaning of the word 'partners' is.
The casting was perfect, and the film was done tastefully. I really don't understand why it was in the horror category on SVOD when it's clearly a drama.
where: mom's sofa rented on Shaw Video On Demand
reason: Everyone loves Psycho.
This is a bio-pic about the year or so that Hitchcock and his wife Alma, spent trying to get the studios to let them make the movie Psycho. It shows the delicate balance that their marriage went through, and shows what the real meaning of the word 'partners' is.
The casting was perfect, and the film was done tastefully. I really don't understand why it was in the horror category on SVOD when it's clearly a drama.
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Top 5 Fav Hugh Dillon Film moments
Anyone who knows me, or has been reading anything I've written in the last 20 years, knows that I'm a big fan of the Canadian rock/punk band Headstones, and that Hugh Dillon is one of my heroes.
And since I just got my hands on the new Headstones cd "Love + Fury", I thought I would do a list of some of my favourite moments in movies that star rocker/actor Hugh Dillon.
5. Trailer Park Boys: The Big Dirty. He plays the character of Sonny in this film. I have to say, there are two moments from this movie that I dig, his intro where he is playing pool and grooving to the old Platinum Blonde song, and the scene that is actually on the deleted extras, where he is yelling at the bouncers calling them "door monkeys".
4. Down to the Dirt. He plays Renny, a drug dealer. He is silent for most of his scene, and it's about two minutes of screen time, but damn he steals it.
3. Ginger Snaps 3 Ginger Snaps Back aka Ginger Snaps Back the Beginning. He plays the Reverend in this film. And my favourite scene is his introduction, where the camera pans past the graveyard and there he is, standing among the headstones. I thought that was such a brilliant tongue and cheek moment.
2. Twitch City. Okay, this is a tv show. But, I crack up whenever I see the scene where he is standing in line at the store waiting for Newbie to stop singing and dancing and check through his order.
1. Hard Core Logo. He plays the lead character Joe Dick, head of the punk band Hard Core Logo, and is beyond brilliant in this movie. It's difficult to pick one favourite scene, as this is one of my all time favourite movies. But, I'm going to go with the scene where the band is standing around arguing on the highway with the sun rising/setting behind them. It's just such an emotional scene, and he manages to pull off angry and disappointed and disgusted all within about two minutes. And it was a one shot. Okay speaking of one shot... I have to add the big ending of the film. When he gets to the final scene, the character is deflated. There is just something in Dillon's eyes that expresses the whole journey of the character even more then his dialogue. Brilliant.
And since I just got my hands on the new Headstones cd "Love + Fury", I thought I would do a list of some of my favourite moments in movies that star rocker/actor Hugh Dillon.
5. Trailer Park Boys: The Big Dirty. He plays the character of Sonny in this film. I have to say, there are two moments from this movie that I dig, his intro where he is playing pool and grooving to the old Platinum Blonde song, and the scene that is actually on the deleted extras, where he is yelling at the bouncers calling them "door monkeys".
4. Down to the Dirt. He plays Renny, a drug dealer. He is silent for most of his scene, and it's about two minutes of screen time, but damn he steals it.
3. Ginger Snaps 3 Ginger Snaps Back aka Ginger Snaps Back the Beginning. He plays the Reverend in this film. And my favourite scene is his introduction, where the camera pans past the graveyard and there he is, standing among the headstones. I thought that was such a brilliant tongue and cheek moment.
2. Twitch City. Okay, this is a tv show. But, I crack up whenever I see the scene where he is standing in line at the store waiting for Newbie to stop singing and dancing and check through his order.
1. Hard Core Logo. He plays the lead character Joe Dick, head of the punk band Hard Core Logo, and is beyond brilliant in this movie. It's difficult to pick one favourite scene, as this is one of my all time favourite movies. But, I'm going to go with the scene where the band is standing around arguing on the highway with the sun rising/setting behind them. It's just such an emotional scene, and he manages to pull off angry and disappointed and disgusted all within about two minutes. And it was a one shot. Okay speaking of one shot... I have to add the big ending of the film. When he gets to the final scene, the character is deflated. There is just something in Dillon's eyes that expresses the whole journey of the character even more then his dialogue. Brilliant.
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Tuesday, June 18, 2013
Year 2 Mid-Season the rest of the story 4
Nosferatu Adventures
Page 4, Chapter 4
Our heroine found herself staring at the large chocolate brown puppy dog eyes of the Second werewolf, and nearly jumping out of her skin. She screamed as his eyes changed from the chocolate brown of a human male to the amber-grey of a werewolf. He stuck his tongue out laughing at her, clearly enjoying himself. "Anyone ever tell you to pick one colour and stick with it?" she asked trying to catch her breath.
"Yeah this weird writer bitch right before I ate her." he said as he turned back around and started to walk off the path into the deeper part of the darkened forest.
The Third werewolf smirked as he turned flicking his own long hair out of his face. "I remember that. You had heartburn for days afterwards. Told you that you shouldn't of had the jalapeno relish." Our heroine stopped cold in her tracks and was starting to wonder if she would make it even a few steps if she ran? "You look pale. Even for a nerdy white chick." he said grinning wide.
"I'm bored." the First werewolf said stretching. He cracked his neck yawning. "Can we get this over with these clothes are starting to itch?" he said scratching then at his chest and neck.
"Yeah, the sooner we get rid of you, the sooner we can go back to our lives." the Third werewolf said."Now where did he get off to?" he asked referring to the Second werewolf.
"And what exactly do you do?" our not so brave heroine asked, a tremble still in her voice.
"Werewolf stuff." the First werewolf said tilting his head towards her rolling his blue eyes at her. "Why? You want to write about it? Take notes on it? Make a great horror story be a best seller." he growled, snapping his teeth at her. She jumped screaming again. "God, really? Why so jumpy? Come on this way."
Turning they went in the direction that the Second werewolf had wandered off in. It seemed to our heroine that they walked for hours till they came upon a small stream where they found the Second werewolf hunched over making snarling noises. The larger werewolf whistled getting his buddy's attention. He looked up, his face gleaming from the blood that covered his mouth and dripped from his chin. A large rabbit lay limp in his hands, streams of blood running down his arms like a crimson rain storm.
"Hey!" the First werewolf screamed at him. "How many times have I said no eating the rabbits!"
"But there are so many of them. Like everywhere." Second werewolf commented as he tossed the dead animal away then dipped his hands into the stream.
"What about the rabbits?" our heroine asked.
The First werewolf ran his hand through his hair shrugging. "They make him too hyper. He starts zipping around leaping..." he started gesturing wide as our heroine burst out in a mad fit of laughter. "Oh yeah laugh it up. You're not the one who has to deal with him when he's like that. Worse then a kid on a sugar high. Flipping, and leaping and suicide dives from between tree branches."
She continued to laugh until the First werewolf stuck his thumb and finger into her mouth. "Hey what the hell?"
"Sun's rising. Just thought I'd check to see if you were fanged. Wouldn't want to step out of the shadows and have you burst into flames on us. Might singe our fur if you know what I mean."
"You thought I was a vampire? Cool." she straightened her shoulders standing taller for a second. The three men exchanged looks.
"What do you expect us to think? Hum? Name like Nosferatu."
"Speaking of names, we have been hiking around here in shadows now for like five hours, and none of you have bothered to introduce yourselves." our heroine saw a fallen tree and sat down.
"You never bothered to ask." the Third werewolf said smiling wide. "I'm Rolf, that's Reuben..." he said pointing to the second werewolf. "And he's Ripper."
"Ripper?" she swallowed the word like it was wrapped in fear.
"Well, it's Dagan actually but you know how it goes." he pointed to Reuben who was still covered in splotches of blood. "I mean, you wolf out once while on shrooms and slaughter two innocent travelers in the middle of the night leaving their severed arms in the middle of the town square and people automatically assume the worst of you." he threw his arms up then let them slap against his thighs.
"Dude, people saw you like a hundred people saw you do it." Rolf said.
"You say it like it's a bad thing." Dagan shrugged closing his eyes."Can we get on with this please? I have places to go, people to hunt."
"I think I need a flea bath." Reuben said scratching at his ear.
"I warned you not to go gallivanting around the other night with that Otter." Rolf said pointing at his buddy. Our heroine nearly fell of the tree she was sitting on when she heard him say that. "It serves him right. Acting like a common street mutt just because he's in wolf form."
"Okay, seriously now, we've got a lot of land to cover before we make it to the graveyard." Dagan commented. "And personally, I'd rather not have to deal with the Queen if we can help it."
"Queen?" our heroine asked still giggling. She heard Reuben make a noise as he made an over exaggerated shiver.
"Trust me, you're going to wish you had some fangs or at lest had packed a big sword or something if we come up against the Queen." Rolf remarked.
Tune in later for another installment of the Nosferatu Adventures starring your heroine...me. (yeah I know I broke my own main rule for doing this, and wrote just story this post and not because I had any new movie posts to flashback to. This was originally part of the last chapter but it would have run too long as one post, so I decided to chop it in half and make this part the next chapter.)
Page 4, Chapter 4
Our heroine found herself staring at the large chocolate brown puppy dog eyes of the Second werewolf, and nearly jumping out of her skin. She screamed as his eyes changed from the chocolate brown of a human male to the amber-grey of a werewolf. He stuck his tongue out laughing at her, clearly enjoying himself. "Anyone ever tell you to pick one colour and stick with it?" she asked trying to catch her breath.
"Yeah this weird writer bitch right before I ate her." he said as he turned back around and started to walk off the path into the deeper part of the darkened forest.
The Third werewolf smirked as he turned flicking his own long hair out of his face. "I remember that. You had heartburn for days afterwards. Told you that you shouldn't of had the jalapeno relish." Our heroine stopped cold in her tracks and was starting to wonder if she would make it even a few steps if she ran? "You look pale. Even for a nerdy white chick." he said grinning wide.
"I'm bored." the First werewolf said stretching. He cracked his neck yawning. "Can we get this over with these clothes are starting to itch?" he said scratching then at his chest and neck.
"Yeah, the sooner we get rid of you, the sooner we can go back to our lives." the Third werewolf said."Now where did he get off to?" he asked referring to the Second werewolf.
"And what exactly do you do?" our not so brave heroine asked, a tremble still in her voice.
"Werewolf stuff." the First werewolf said tilting his head towards her rolling his blue eyes at her. "Why? You want to write about it? Take notes on it? Make a great horror story be a best seller." he growled, snapping his teeth at her. She jumped screaming again. "God, really? Why so jumpy? Come on this way."
Turning they went in the direction that the Second werewolf had wandered off in. It seemed to our heroine that they walked for hours till they came upon a small stream where they found the Second werewolf hunched over making snarling noises. The larger werewolf whistled getting his buddy's attention. He looked up, his face gleaming from the blood that covered his mouth and dripped from his chin. A large rabbit lay limp in his hands, streams of blood running down his arms like a crimson rain storm.
"Hey!" the First werewolf screamed at him. "How many times have I said no eating the rabbits!"
"But there are so many of them. Like everywhere." Second werewolf commented as he tossed the dead animal away then dipped his hands into the stream.
"What about the rabbits?" our heroine asked.
The First werewolf ran his hand through his hair shrugging. "They make him too hyper. He starts zipping around leaping..." he started gesturing wide as our heroine burst out in a mad fit of laughter. "Oh yeah laugh it up. You're not the one who has to deal with him when he's like that. Worse then a kid on a sugar high. Flipping, and leaping and suicide dives from between tree branches."
She continued to laugh until the First werewolf stuck his thumb and finger into her mouth. "Hey what the hell?"
"Sun's rising. Just thought I'd check to see if you were fanged. Wouldn't want to step out of the shadows and have you burst into flames on us. Might singe our fur if you know what I mean."
"You thought I was a vampire? Cool." she straightened her shoulders standing taller for a second. The three men exchanged looks.
"What do you expect us to think? Hum? Name like Nosferatu."
"Speaking of names, we have been hiking around here in shadows now for like five hours, and none of you have bothered to introduce yourselves." our heroine saw a fallen tree and sat down.
"You never bothered to ask." the Third werewolf said smiling wide. "I'm Rolf, that's Reuben..." he said pointing to the second werewolf. "And he's Ripper."
"Ripper?" she swallowed the word like it was wrapped in fear.
"Well, it's Dagan actually but you know how it goes." he pointed to Reuben who was still covered in splotches of blood. "I mean, you wolf out once while on shrooms and slaughter two innocent travelers in the middle of the night leaving their severed arms in the middle of the town square and people automatically assume the worst of you." he threw his arms up then let them slap against his thighs.
"Dude, people saw you like a hundred people saw you do it." Rolf said.
"You say it like it's a bad thing." Dagan shrugged closing his eyes."Can we get on with this please? I have places to go, people to hunt."
"I think I need a flea bath." Reuben said scratching at his ear.
"I warned you not to go gallivanting around the other night with that Otter." Rolf said pointing at his buddy. Our heroine nearly fell of the tree she was sitting on when she heard him say that. "It serves him right. Acting like a common street mutt just because he's in wolf form."
"Okay, seriously now, we've got a lot of land to cover before we make it to the graveyard." Dagan commented. "And personally, I'd rather not have to deal with the Queen if we can help it."
"Queen?" our heroine asked still giggling. She heard Reuben make a noise as he made an over exaggerated shiver.
"Trust me, you're going to wish you had some fangs or at lest had packed a big sword or something if we come up against the Queen." Rolf remarked.
Tune in later for another installment of the Nosferatu Adventures starring your heroine...me. (yeah I know I broke my own main rule for doing this, and wrote just story this post and not because I had any new movie posts to flashback to. This was originally part of the last chapter but it would have run too long as one post, so I decided to chop it in half and make this part the next chapter.)
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Year 2 Mid-Season the Rest of the Story 3
The Nosferatu Adventures
Page 3, Chapter 3
Our heroine found herself trembling now, wondering if the wolves were going to kill her. Then an odd thing happened, they started to shift. The sound of their bones snap crackling and popping caused our not so brave heroine to cover her ears and close her eyes. Because, let's face it, she's a wimp and can't take anything. She stood there cringing and having a mild freak out while the wolves transformed.
"Oh my god man. That's going to give me nightmares for a week." she said as she opened her eyes once the echoing of broken bones had stopped. "Holy Anne Rice novels Batman! You're naked." She brought her vampire themed lunchbox up to her eyes hiding behind it as she tried to be polite and not look. "Owww!" she had slammed the hard metal case against her forehead like a moron.
(But who are we kidding, she totally looked. I mean, really three hot werewolves in human form standing ten feet from her, she's totally going to sneak a peak.) "Okay yeah hi how you doing, you maybe should get dressed now, put some pants on, or a towel, or skirt or you know, championship belt even."
"That's no fun." the one werewolf in human form said as he took a step towards her. As he did, a swirl of mist wrapped around his foot and half his leg leaving in it's wake a boot and half a pant leg. He seemed to be fully dressed by the time it took him to reach her. Looking over his shoulder, she noticed the other two were also fully dressed.
"Well, what can I say? More then one naked man at a time is too much for me to handle." she remarked.
"You called the Magic Ninjas. They couldn't make it, they're on tour so they sent us instead." the second one spoke as he scratched at his long hair. "Damn, think I got fleas."
"Hang on. So you're suppose to help me get through this forest?" she asked pointing at the second guy, with the hand still holding her vampire themed lunchbox. It made a clanking sound as she did.
"Actually, we were suppose to help you back at the desert, but you were impatient and didn't wait." the first guy replied.
"But Clive helped. The wiseman."
"Uh Clive?" the third guy raised an eyebrow at her shrugging. "Don't know a Clive?" He turned and started to walk away from her, the second guy following. The first werewolf in human form, still stood beside her, reaching for her binder.
"What's in here?" he flipped through the handwritten notes on the themes found in most vampire movies. "How is anyone suppose to read this? Your handwriting sucks man." he said closing it tossing it back at her. "Come on, try to keep up. There are rules to everything. Like, when you introduce something at the beginning, you have to make sure it comes into play before the end of the story." (and pay attention now to the links for the flashback) While they walked, he told her a story about Judgement and one about the End of the world. The second werewolf guy turned to face them while he walked backwards on the path leaves crunching under foot as he did.
"That's nothing. One time we were out hunting and came face to face with all these Witches It was brutal." he started to tie his hair up in a very smooth ponytail slamming into the back of the third and might I say larger werewolf who had stopped abruptly on the path.
"Seriously? He just finished telling her two freaky bone chilling stories about the end of life as we know it and you bring up a few wand wavers? Dude, have you gone Psycho ?"
"Hanging out with you two all the time, just a little bit." he remarked.
Tune in later for another installment of the Nosferatu Adventures starring your heroine...me.
Page 3, Chapter 3
Our heroine found herself trembling now, wondering if the wolves were going to kill her. Then an odd thing happened, they started to shift. The sound of their bones snap crackling and popping caused our not so brave heroine to cover her ears and close her eyes. Because, let's face it, she's a wimp and can't take anything. She stood there cringing and having a mild freak out while the wolves transformed.
"Oh my god man. That's going to give me nightmares for a week." she said as she opened her eyes once the echoing of broken bones had stopped. "Holy Anne Rice novels Batman! You're naked." She brought her vampire themed lunchbox up to her eyes hiding behind it as she tried to be polite and not look. "Owww!" she had slammed the hard metal case against her forehead like a moron.
(But who are we kidding, she totally looked. I mean, really three hot werewolves in human form standing ten feet from her, she's totally going to sneak a peak.) "Okay yeah hi how you doing, you maybe should get dressed now, put some pants on, or a towel, or skirt or you know, championship belt even."
"That's no fun." the one werewolf in human form said as he took a step towards her. As he did, a swirl of mist wrapped around his foot and half his leg leaving in it's wake a boot and half a pant leg. He seemed to be fully dressed by the time it took him to reach her. Looking over his shoulder, she noticed the other two were also fully dressed.
"Well, what can I say? More then one naked man at a time is too much for me to handle." she remarked.
"You called the Magic Ninjas. They couldn't make it, they're on tour so they sent us instead." the second one spoke as he scratched at his long hair. "Damn, think I got fleas."
"Hang on. So you're suppose to help me get through this forest?" she asked pointing at the second guy, with the hand still holding her vampire themed lunchbox. It made a clanking sound as she did.
"Actually, we were suppose to help you back at the desert, but you were impatient and didn't wait." the first guy replied.
"But Clive helped. The wiseman."
"Uh Clive?" the third guy raised an eyebrow at her shrugging. "Don't know a Clive?" He turned and started to walk away from her, the second guy following. The first werewolf in human form, still stood beside her, reaching for her binder.
"What's in here?" he flipped through the handwritten notes on the themes found in most vampire movies. "How is anyone suppose to read this? Your handwriting sucks man." he said closing it tossing it back at her. "Come on, try to keep up. There are rules to everything. Like, when you introduce something at the beginning, you have to make sure it comes into play before the end of the story." (and pay attention now to the links for the flashback) While they walked, he told her a story about Judgement and one about the End of the world. The second werewolf guy turned to face them while he walked backwards on the path leaves crunching under foot as he did.
"That's nothing. One time we were out hunting and came face to face with all these Witches It was brutal." he started to tie his hair up in a very smooth ponytail slamming into the back of the third and might I say larger werewolf who had stopped abruptly on the path.
"Seriously? He just finished telling her two freaky bone chilling stories about the end of life as we know it and you bring up a few wand wavers? Dude, have you gone Psycho ?"
"Hanging out with you two all the time, just a little bit." he remarked.
Tune in later for another installment of the Nosferatu Adventures starring your heroine...me.
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Fast cars, Giants, and Psychos
The good thing about spending a few days at mom's, is that we rent a lot of movies on Shaw Video On Demand. The bad thing about spending a few days at mom's is that we rent a lot of movies on Shaw Video On Demand. I am dreading the cable bill when it comes, cause I have to pay for the rentals and the wrestling pay-per-views. I also tend to bake a lot when I am here, which means eating a lot of cookies and cakes.
So Sunday was a double bill. 2 Fast and 2 Furious and Fast and Furious 3 Tokyo Drift.
The second part of the Fast and Furious films has one of the leads from the first film returning, as an undercover cop trying to break a smuggling ring. I have to say, it had more the feel of an episode of a typical cop show then it did any of the other F/F movies I've seen so far (to that point I'd seen part 1, 4, and 5)
The 3rd offering is totally out of sync with the plot of the rest of the series. It seems it is suppose to take place a few years after part four, which adds to the already confusing timeline. All new characters are introduced. A teenager is sent to live with his dad in Japan after being arrested for drag racing, and while there ends up in a personal battle with a member of the local mob.
I have to say, I liked part 2 better then 3.
Monday I watched - 7 Psychopaths and Mental. Also, I guess you can say, a double bill.
7 Psychopaths, is about a screenwriter who is trying to write a non-violent film about a bunch of psychopaths, most of which is based on the people he comes in contact with. His best friend being one of them, and his writing partner. I thought this was one of the smarter films I've seen in a long time. It was witty, laugh out loud at times, and kept the pace strong.
Mental is about a drifter who is picked up on the street by a man who's wife just went into the psychiatric ward and is desperate for someone to look after his five daughters. The kids all believe they are going crazy too, but we soon learn it's just their need for attention that is the real issue. Meanwhile, the drifter is grieving herself after the death of her daughter, and is set on stealing a prized shark from her husband's sea emporium.
Tuesday (today) I watched Jack the Giant Slayer. The story gives a fresh take on the old fairy tale, having Jack and a run away princess accidentally create a stalk, and the king's men having to recuse her.
I have to say, after months of waiting to see this film, I was expecting more then what it offered. Bit of a let down. Stanley Tucci was brilliant as the villain in this, and for once, his wig looked good.
Okay, till later.
So Sunday was a double bill. 2 Fast and 2 Furious and Fast and Furious 3 Tokyo Drift.
The second part of the Fast and Furious films has one of the leads from the first film returning, as an undercover cop trying to break a smuggling ring. I have to say, it had more the feel of an episode of a typical cop show then it did any of the other F/F movies I've seen so far (to that point I'd seen part 1, 4, and 5)
The 3rd offering is totally out of sync with the plot of the rest of the series. It seems it is suppose to take place a few years after part four, which adds to the already confusing timeline. All new characters are introduced. A teenager is sent to live with his dad in Japan after being arrested for drag racing, and while there ends up in a personal battle with a member of the local mob.
I have to say, I liked part 2 better then 3.
Monday I watched - 7 Psychopaths and Mental. Also, I guess you can say, a double bill.
7 Psychopaths, is about a screenwriter who is trying to write a non-violent film about a bunch of psychopaths, most of which is based on the people he comes in contact with. His best friend being one of them, and his writing partner. I thought this was one of the smarter films I've seen in a long time. It was witty, laugh out loud at times, and kept the pace strong.
Mental is about a drifter who is picked up on the street by a man who's wife just went into the psychiatric ward and is desperate for someone to look after his five daughters. The kids all believe they are going crazy too, but we soon learn it's just their need for attention that is the real issue. Meanwhile, the drifter is grieving herself after the death of her daughter, and is set on stealing a prized shark from her husband's sea emporium.
Tuesday (today) I watched Jack the Giant Slayer. The story gives a fresh take on the old fairy tale, having Jack and a run away princess accidentally create a stalk, and the king's men having to recuse her.
I have to say, after months of waiting to see this film, I was expecting more then what it offered. Bit of a let down. Stanley Tucci was brilliant as the villain in this, and for once, his wig looked good.
Okay, till later.
Saturday, June 15, 2013
More witches and a hitcher
This was a very good week for me movie wise.
I got to rent on Shaw Video On Demand, Oz The Great and Powerful, Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, and Hansel and Gretel Witch Hunters.
We'll start with the wizard of oz sequel. Which is actually like the fourth movie or something like that in the not so real series. (Wizard of Oz, Return to Oz, Witches of Oz and Oz the Great and Powerful. There might be more, this is just what I'm aware of.)
Anyone who knows me, knows I'm not a fan of the original Wizard of Oz at all. So I was iffy about checking this one out. I literally went back and forth on if I really wanted to see it. But, I sat through it, and it was better then I was expecting. I had to admit, I was disappointed that Bruce Campbell on had one short 30 second scene. He was the main reason I rented it.
This is basically how the wizard gets to Oz and becomes who he is. Which sort of undoes the beginning of the original because in the beginning of the original, Dorothy sees the wizard when she runs away from home.
Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. I've been needled by people over the years to check this out, given my love for shows like Red Dwarf and Farscape. And I have to admit, this one was cute in it's own way. I just want to know what the whole gimmick with the towels was really about?
Hansel and Gretel Witch Hunters. Okay, this I really liked. An action film that was in the same vein as Van Helsing. I totally see there being a sequel with that one. We follow the grown up team as they take out as many witches as possible, only to find out that their mother was a head witch, and therefore Gretel herself as well.
It's an action revenge film with enough comedy to keep everyone happy.
P.S. on the vampire front...watched Lost Boys 3 Thirst
till later
I got to rent on Shaw Video On Demand, Oz The Great and Powerful, Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, and Hansel and Gretel Witch Hunters.
We'll start with the wizard of oz sequel. Which is actually like the fourth movie or something like that in the not so real series. (Wizard of Oz, Return to Oz, Witches of Oz and Oz the Great and Powerful. There might be more, this is just what I'm aware of.)
Anyone who knows me, knows I'm not a fan of the original Wizard of Oz at all. So I was iffy about checking this one out. I literally went back and forth on if I really wanted to see it. But, I sat through it, and it was better then I was expecting. I had to admit, I was disappointed that Bruce Campbell on had one short 30 second scene. He was the main reason I rented it.
This is basically how the wizard gets to Oz and becomes who he is. Which sort of undoes the beginning of the original because in the beginning of the original, Dorothy sees the wizard when she runs away from home.
Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. I've been needled by people over the years to check this out, given my love for shows like Red Dwarf and Farscape. And I have to admit, this one was cute in it's own way. I just want to know what the whole gimmick with the towels was really about?
Hansel and Gretel Witch Hunters. Okay, this I really liked. An action film that was in the same vein as Van Helsing. I totally see there being a sequel with that one. We follow the grown up team as they take out as many witches as possible, only to find out that their mother was a head witch, and therefore Gretel herself as well.
It's an action revenge film with enough comedy to keep everyone happy.
P.S. on the vampire front...watched Lost Boys 3 Thirst
till later
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Thursday, June 13, 2013
The End man
Movie: This is the End (2013)
Where: Cinema
Reason: Jay Baruchel
SPOILER ALERT
plot: Canadian actor Jay Baruchel goes to L.A. to visit Seth Rogen, who is a Canadian actor living in Hollywood now. On his first night in L.A., they go to James Franco's house for a big housewarming party. Jay does not want to be there and manages to talk Seth into leaving with him. They stop at a corner store and while there, all hell breaks loose, literally. What at first seems like an earthquake and very possibly aliens abducting people, turns out to be the actual apocalypse. They have no choice but to return to Franco's home, and as they do, the mouth to hell opens up on his lawn. Half of Hollywood has been sucked in, and a few honest souls taken to heaven. The handful of actors who are hiding in Franco's house, realize they were not good enough to make it to heaven. They soon run out of supplies, and have to find more. Meanwhile, demons are chasing them, possessing them and turning everyone against each other. In the end, it's a choice, sacrifice themselves and hope they make it to heaven or be eaten by demons.
END OF SPOILER
I laughed so much during this film. Normally, I'm not one for raunchy films. This even with some of the subject matter manages to keep the raunchiness to a minimum and is a buddy movie at heart. If you are wondering why I didn't use character names in the write up, it's because they use their real names in this film.
This has a taste of every post-apocalyptic movie, with just enough Exorcist thrown in for good measure, ever done. And somehow, it works.
Ironically, this is also so to speak, a remake of a previous movie that both Baruchel and Rogen did called "Jay and Seth Versus the Apocalypse"
What do I think I learned from this film? To get to heaven you need to be more then just good, you need to be Canadian and a Backstreet Boys' fan.
Where: Cinema
Reason: Jay Baruchel
SPOILER ALERT
plot: Canadian actor Jay Baruchel goes to L.A. to visit Seth Rogen, who is a Canadian actor living in Hollywood now. On his first night in L.A., they go to James Franco's house for a big housewarming party. Jay does not want to be there and manages to talk Seth into leaving with him. They stop at a corner store and while there, all hell breaks loose, literally. What at first seems like an earthquake and very possibly aliens abducting people, turns out to be the actual apocalypse. They have no choice but to return to Franco's home, and as they do, the mouth to hell opens up on his lawn. Half of Hollywood has been sucked in, and a few honest souls taken to heaven. The handful of actors who are hiding in Franco's house, realize they were not good enough to make it to heaven. They soon run out of supplies, and have to find more. Meanwhile, demons are chasing them, possessing them and turning everyone against each other. In the end, it's a choice, sacrifice themselves and hope they make it to heaven or be eaten by demons.
END OF SPOILER
I laughed so much during this film. Normally, I'm not one for raunchy films. This even with some of the subject matter manages to keep the raunchiness to a minimum and is a buddy movie at heart. If you are wondering why I didn't use character names in the write up, it's because they use their real names in this film.
This has a taste of every post-apocalyptic movie, with just enough Exorcist thrown in for good measure, ever done. And somehow, it works.
Ironically, this is also so to speak, a remake of a previous movie that both Baruchel and Rogen did called "Jay and Seth Versus the Apocalypse"
What do I think I learned from this film? To get to heaven you need to be more then just good, you need to be Canadian and a Backstreet Boys' fan.
Monday, June 10, 2013
Final Judgement
Movie: Dredd
Where: Mom's on Shaw Video On Demand
Reason: I really wanted to see how they handled this remake
plot: Some point in the future, the population has become so overrun that half the world live in skyrises referred to as blocks. Most of these are slums. Inside one of these blocks, two police officers are being hunted down by the drug lord of the block.
This is a straight up, shoot'em up movie. And given the fact it's set in pretty much one location for 90% of the film, there are a few scenes at the beginning that happen elsewhere, it manages to do what it's suppose to, make you feel isolated without making you bored.
I semi-remember the original movie Judge Dredd (1995) (and why I thought there had been a second one back in the 1990's is beyond me?) and don't really remember anything being the same from the first movie to the remake.
I know the whole story is based on graphic novels/comics, but I've never read them so I can't compare.
But, I did really like the 2012 remake of Dredd. I think that Karl Urban was the perfect choice for the role, even though you never see his face! Seriously, if you didn't know going into this that it was him, you would go the whole film without a clue.
Where: Mom's on Shaw Video On Demand
Reason: I really wanted to see how they handled this remake
plot: Some point in the future, the population has become so overrun that half the world live in skyrises referred to as blocks. Most of these are slums. Inside one of these blocks, two police officers are being hunted down by the drug lord of the block.
This is a straight up, shoot'em up movie. And given the fact it's set in pretty much one location for 90% of the film, there are a few scenes at the beginning that happen elsewhere, it manages to do what it's suppose to, make you feel isolated without making you bored.
I semi-remember the original movie Judge Dredd (1995) (and why I thought there had been a second one back in the 1990's is beyond me?) and don't really remember anything being the same from the first movie to the remake.
I know the whole story is based on graphic novels/comics, but I've never read them so I can't compare.
But, I did really like the 2012 remake of Dredd. I think that Karl Urban was the perfect choice for the role, even though you never see his face! Seriously, if you didn't know going into this that it was him, you would go the whole film without a clue.
Sunday, June 9, 2013
Year 2 Mid-Season The Rest of the Story 2
The Nosferatu Adventures
Page 2, Chapter 2
Our heroine found herself at the edge of the desert. Tired, thirsty and alone. Or so she thought. That was until she saw the the other lone figure sitting under the shade of a large cactus. The figure was a man, dressed in dust covered leather pants and a black t-shirt. He had sunglasses on that hid his eyes. But something told her that if she got a look at them, they would frighten her. The man was smoking a large cigarette that never seemed to end. He was considered the desert's wiseman, his name was Clive. (Yes, I named him Clive.)
Clive was there to help her on the next phase of her quest,(and remind you about the links to the flashbacks) to get her through the desert without falling into the Dirt. There was a Ship, he told her, she just needed to find it without getting Stuck in the sand.
"Oh and one more thing. Watch your step, not only is this bat country, but there are buffalo."
"Will they trample me?" she asked holding her vampire print binder like a shield to her chest.
Clive stood there for a second staring up at the sky. "No, I'm telling you to watch out for the poop. Nasty stuff." He pointed his never ending cigarette towards the East and told her to head that way. "Once you hit the end of the desert, you'll find what you're looking for. But mind the shadows. There are Thieves in them. They'll take you for all that you've got."
She thanked him wishing he'd given her some water, as she continued on in the direction that he'd pointed her. But she stopped a few feet and turned. "Hang on! I had called up the Magic Ninjas, so where are they and why was that dude..." but she found herself talking to no one. Clive the desert wiseman had vanished. Turning around again, our heroine found herself suddenly facing the edge of a wooded area. "I guess I found the forest?" Knowing that the graveyard was just beyond it, She took a deep breath and started into the darkness of it. "Damn it, I really wish I had been smart enough to pack a flashlight. And a lunch."
On very shaky legs, she entered the forest, holding her lunchbox and binder in one hand while she hung on to the nearest tree with the other. That's when she heard the laughter. She was not the only one in the forest it would seem. There were suddenly three large wolves on the path before her. "Wolves that laugh? That's not good."
Tune in later for another installment of the Nosferatu Adventures starring your heroine...me.
Page 2, Chapter 2
Our heroine found herself at the edge of the desert. Tired, thirsty and alone. Or so she thought. That was until she saw the the other lone figure sitting under the shade of a large cactus. The figure was a man, dressed in dust covered leather pants and a black t-shirt. He had sunglasses on that hid his eyes. But something told her that if she got a look at them, they would frighten her. The man was smoking a large cigarette that never seemed to end. He was considered the desert's wiseman, his name was Clive. (Yes, I named him Clive.)
Clive was there to help her on the next phase of her quest,(and remind you about the links to the flashbacks) to get her through the desert without falling into the Dirt. There was a Ship, he told her, she just needed to find it without getting Stuck in the sand.
"Oh and one more thing. Watch your step, not only is this bat country, but there are buffalo."
"Will they trample me?" she asked holding her vampire print binder like a shield to her chest.
Clive stood there for a second staring up at the sky. "No, I'm telling you to watch out for the poop. Nasty stuff." He pointed his never ending cigarette towards the East and told her to head that way. "Once you hit the end of the desert, you'll find what you're looking for. But mind the shadows. There are Thieves in them. They'll take you for all that you've got."
She thanked him wishing he'd given her some water, as she continued on in the direction that he'd pointed her. But she stopped a few feet and turned. "Hang on! I had called up the Magic Ninjas, so where are they and why was that dude..." but she found herself talking to no one. Clive the desert wiseman had vanished. Turning around again, our heroine found herself suddenly facing the edge of a wooded area. "I guess I found the forest?" Knowing that the graveyard was just beyond it, She took a deep breath and started into the darkness of it. "Damn it, I really wish I had been smart enough to pack a flashlight. And a lunch."
On very shaky legs, she entered the forest, holding her lunchbox and binder in one hand while she hung on to the nearest tree with the other. That's when she heard the laughter. She was not the only one in the forest it would seem. There were suddenly three large wolves on the path before her. "Wolves that laugh? That's not good."
Tune in later for another installment of the Nosferatu Adventures starring your heroine...me.
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Happy Birthday
To actor Johnny Depp who turns 50 today.
You might notice that he's got a category all his own on here, that's because he's got to be one of, if not my favourite actors.
I've already done a top 5 of his movies last year (here man here) And 12 of his movies were part of my original year challenge.
You might notice that he's got a category all his own on here, that's because he's got to be one of, if not my favourite actors.
I've already done a top 5 of his movies last year (here man here) And 12 of his movies were part of my original year challenge.
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Friday, June 7, 2013
Witches and Theives
Monday, I was able to rent on Shaw Video On Demand, Beautiful Creatures. And yesterday, also on Shaw Video On Demand, I was able to catch Identity Thief.
I really liked both these films.
Beautiful Creatures, I had read the book few months ago for book club (still upset about that not working out) and at the time had hoped to see the film in the cinema. Didn't. But, that's fine, got to check it out this week on rental and it was fairly true to the novel.
plot: A small southern town becomes the central gathering place of a family of feuding witches after a teenaged girl moved back to town. On her 16th birthday, the forces of dark or light will choose her for themselves, unless someone she loves takes her place. With only four months left before her birthday, she has one wish, to have as normal a life as possible before then, with high school rivalries and proms.
Identity Thief, it's a buddy-road movie.
plot: After finding out that someone has stolen his identity, causing him to loose his job and be arrested, Sandy decides to confront the woman using his name and who's emptied out his accounts. She reluctantly agrees to go with him on a four day car ride to explain to his boss as long as he does not press charges. Soon they find themselves on the run from drug dealers and a bounty hunter. All they can hope is that they survive the four days in one piece.
p.s. I did watch Lost Boys 2 Tribe for the vampire half of things this week. More on the vampire stuff later.
till later.
I really liked both these films.
Beautiful Creatures, I had read the book few months ago for book club (still upset about that not working out) and at the time had hoped to see the film in the cinema. Didn't. But, that's fine, got to check it out this week on rental and it was fairly true to the novel.
plot: A small southern town becomes the central gathering place of a family of feuding witches after a teenaged girl moved back to town. On her 16th birthday, the forces of dark or light will choose her for themselves, unless someone she loves takes her place. With only four months left before her birthday, she has one wish, to have as normal a life as possible before then, with high school rivalries and proms.
Identity Thief, it's a buddy-road movie.
plot: After finding out that someone has stolen his identity, causing him to loose his job and be arrested, Sandy decides to confront the woman using his name and who's emptied out his accounts. She reluctantly agrees to go with him on a four day car ride to explain to his boss as long as he does not press charges. Soon they find themselves on the run from drug dealers and a bounty hunter. All they can hope is that they survive the four days in one piece.
p.s. I did watch Lost Boys 2 Tribe for the vampire half of things this week. More on the vampire stuff later.
till later.
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Saturday, June 1, 2013
Stuck in a car with you
movie: The Guilt Trip
Where I saw it: mom's, on Shaw On Demand
reason for seeing it: mom's choice
Oh my god! I'm so bad man, I actually saw this two weeks ago, like two or three days before I had gone to see the latest Star Trek, so this should have been mentioned few weeks ago.
Dude, I really liked this film. I thought it was funny, witty, and so heartbreakingly real on so many levels.
plot: A salesman who's just found out his mom named him after the big love of her life, decides to track down the man and without telling his mother, invites her along on a cross country trip in order for her to see him again. Along the way, the two realize they have more in common then they ever knew they did. From a drunken brawl in a hotel, to visiting his first girlfriend only to find she's married, to having his mother help him pitch a tv commercial, their bond grows.
I sort of hope that this gets a second offering. There is a great hint during the credits at the end that if it does, they might go to Paris. That would be an interesting idea.
till later
Where I saw it: mom's, on Shaw On Demand
reason for seeing it: mom's choice
Oh my god! I'm so bad man, I actually saw this two weeks ago, like two or three days before I had gone to see the latest Star Trek, so this should have been mentioned few weeks ago.
Dude, I really liked this film. I thought it was funny, witty, and so heartbreakingly real on so many levels.
plot: A salesman who's just found out his mom named him after the big love of her life, decides to track down the man and without telling his mother, invites her along on a cross country trip in order for her to see him again. Along the way, the two realize they have more in common then they ever knew they did. From a drunken brawl in a hotel, to visiting his first girlfriend only to find she's married, to having his mother help him pitch a tv commercial, their bond grows.
I sort of hope that this gets a second offering. There is a great hint during the credits at the end that if it does, they might go to Paris. That would be an interesting idea.
till later
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